


Fuck You, I’m Still Straight!

by Monsters_and_Matsu



Series: More Freemind Please [1]
Category: freeman's mind
Genre: Alcohol, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Denial, Dirty Talk, Drunkenness, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Explicit Language, Fantasizing, Friends to Lovers, Hand Jobs, Idiots in Love, Internal Conflict, Internalized Homophobia, Kissing, Love/Hate, M/M, Masturbation, Mild S&M, Narcissism, Paranoia, Porn, Porn with Feelings, Power Play, Praise Kink, Rage, Rough Sex, Roughhousing, Roughness, Safewords, Sexual Confusion, Sexual Repression, Slurs, Threats of Violence, Verbal Humiliation, Workplace Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-06
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:54:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,576
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27424549
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Monsters_and_Matsu/pseuds/Monsters_and_Matsu
Summary: Freemind angrily jerks off in the privacy of his home after work. It all snowballs from there.A short bi-denial Freemind fic turned into a multi-chapter masterpiece ;)If you don't know Freeman's mind, just know this shit is gonna be rough & read the tags.
Relationships: Barney Calhoun/Gordon Freemind
Series: More Freemind Please [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2031052
Comments: 142
Kudos: 307





	1. Jerk

**Author's Note:**

> Ship: This is Freeman's mind Gordon and canon Barney.  
> Setting: Pre-Canon / Resonance Cascade never happened.
> 
> Art for this fic: https://twitter.com/Monsters_Matsu/status/1324937590450118656

Freemind is at home. His small single person dwelling. One bathroom, one bedroom. There was no reason for more. It was just him and always has been.

He sits on the edge of his bed watching television after another day of work. Though it appeared that he was watching it, his mind was somewhere else. Thinking over the day’s interactions…

A bottle of liquor sat in his hands but he was playing with the cap more than drinking it. Taking a causal sip every now and again.

These days were as average as they could get working at Black Mesa. Everything was stable, slowly droning on, research crawling towards its final goals but far from completion.

Often the scientists, guards and other workers could be found making small talk. Just trying to move the day along. Then they could go home and live the rest of their normal lives.

In this quiet of the evening, something was stirring inside his head. Gordon’s mind was foggy. He couldn’t sit still, couldn’t relax. _Fuck._

He scratched his chest, the liquor making his loins tingle.

With a frown and furrowed brows he got up. Putting the bottle down and fumbling around in his side table drawers, he had a cd player and flipped through a chunky book full of music. He stared at a few. No, not that one today. No, no. Oh there’s a good one.

Then he headed to the bathroom.

He put a heavy metal cd in his discman and set it down on the counter, shoving the headphones over his ears. Insane drums and sick guitars riffs started to play. This was giving him the energy he wanted. And drowned out most of the noise around him.

He was drifting off to the beats, squeezing his eyes shut as the music blared.

Freemind leaned his hands on the sink. No matter how loud it played, he still had something on his mind- rather someone.

He begrudgingly looked up and met his own gaze in the mirror. He couldn’t help a smug grin though. Even after a long sweaty day on the job, he looked sexy as Hell.

He opened the mirror. Tucked into the back of the medicine cabinet door was a picture of Freemind and Barney together. The two of them in uniform at some kind of work event. Freemind wearing his usual grimace but Barney... wore a charming smile.

“You again.” Freemind mumbled to himself while rocking slightly to the music.

“You just had to catch me during my break today, huh? Walk in while I’m trying to have two seconds of quiet. What did you even start talking about. It’s not like I can have an intellectual conversation with you, you’re just an... uneducated simpleton...”

Freemind stared at the picture as if he was talking to his co-worker. But he wouldn’t be caught dead looking at him like this in person. His words tried to be angry but he was glaring longingly. Glancing over Barney’s dark pushed back hair and the way his clothing complimented it, before landing on his face again.

“Yeah, I bet you just can’t help yourself... You see me by myself and you’re dying to hang out one on one...” Freemind was running a hand down his own shirt, twisting it in his fingers as he zoned out. He was replaying it in his head, their interaction today. How much he actually liked it. Always secretly hoping he’d strike up a chat with him.

The way he’d bump elbows with him jokingly... chancing Freemind's usual reaction to scream at him and treading a fine line of pressing his buttons. The way he laughed off his threats... That accent. That little smart ass smile.

He felt hot all of a sudden and brought his hands to the bottom of his shirt, peeling it off over his head. He threw it somewhere before sighing loudly and returning his fingers to his skin. Groping his chest and pressing them down the bumps of his abs. “Yeah I bet you would fucking love to see this right now... how fucking sexy I am. Bet you’re dying that one day you’ll catch me changing out of my uniform or using the locker showers. In your slutty little dreams, Calhoun. I’d never give you the satisfaction...”

His hands wandered around, going anywhere from dragging along his sides to grabbing his own neck roughly. His eyes were cloudy with thoughts. Daydreams. Fantasies. 

God, he was so sexual. They didn’t know what they were missing. Everyone that pushed him away calling him a creep or an asshole. Did they not have _eyes?_ Fuck, he was feeling himself so hard right now. And... thinking about someone that was almost worthy of his presence.

He slammed a hand down on the sink ledge and other grinded down on his crotch hard as he focused on the polaroid again. “You couldn’t _handle_ all _this._ I’d fucking destroy you. The things I’d fucking do to you. You’d beg for me to be gentle but I don’t know how to go easy, I’d make you _scream_ like the little fag you are.” Ugh... If he could get his hands on him right now... he’d ravish him like he was the last damned person on earth.

He rubbed over his jeans so forcefully it was threatening to chafe his fingers against the harsh fabric. Making himself groan he threw his head back. “You fucking _wish_. If you had even one taste of me, you’d be begging to suck my fat dick every time we had a bathroom break. The thought of me would fucking _ruin you._ ” He bit his lip as he wore a hot aggressive expression. His breath was noticeably heavier.

 _God yes_... He was a treat few could have. Everything about him was just miles and miles above everyone else, they’d be lucky to have him. His body, his smarts, his whole personality- it was impeccable. That’s why Barney couldn’t resist talking to him. He was too perfect. A man like him knew a pure sex God when he saw it. Barney had good taste... Just like himself.

He squeezed over his balls until he milked more strangled moans out of himself, “Yeah just like that. I’m _so good._ I haaaaAUgh- I have the maaagic fucking touch~ so good. _I’m so fucking good._ ”

He unzipped his pants and pulled his dick out as his imagination tortured him. He pictured Barney’s smug smirk waiting for him, challenging him to live up to his words. Freemind spit in his hand before gripping his rock hard cock and stroking it slowly.

“Hah-! Yeah, I’m making you _savor_ it. You think I would unleash my full force onto you right away? _No..._ You have to wait you fucking bastard. You think just anybody gets to enjoy my unrestrained fucking- fury? You got- uuuUgh, another thing coming...!” His other hand came up to stroke his hair back out of his warm dazed face.

An array of masculine noises escaped him as he jerked himself to his leisure. Pulling the skin of his shaft with every tug. Rubbing his thumb firmly over his sensitive cut tip. His hips gesturing seductively as they followed along. 

But the idea of his co-worker beneath him was a thought strong enough to start unraveling him. He picked up the pace and bucked into his grip harder, “Tsh, you like that I’m doing all the work you little bitch! I told you, you couldn’t handle me. I’m one hundred percent pure- fucking testooostrone!” He groaned loudly with tints of pleasure running off his voice.

His pumping got more desperate and he stopped only briefly to spit in his palm again, he was salivating at the imagery he conjured up. He could hear Calhoun's hot defiant voice in his ears. He'd shut that smart ass up, fuck him until he was even stupider than before. He'd be reduced to nothing more than pitiful groans in that tasty little accent of his. Barney would tell him to stop holding back, pleading to give him the full Freemind package.

"Yeah you want me to show you how its done, what fucking a _real man feels like._ " A few droplets were forming on his face, getting lost in his facial hair. Every strike of his hips were as if he was ramming that fat juicy Calhoun ass. He bite his lip as an overbearing musical drop played in his headphones.

His pale heated face was completely flushed and his once strong posture crumbled over the sink.

He hunched over, free arm leaning on the ledge and he held his face in his open palm. His dominant hand pumped quickly below him.

“ _Fuck yes-_ Daddy likes. Hgn guh, f-fucking give it to me-”

Heavy guttural noises slipped in and out between his ragged sentences.

This was the best feeling, guilty and indulgent. This type of pleasure was so much stronger because he fought it so often- Littered with pings of disgust for these forbidden fantasies. They were all his- Only he knew what really got his rocks off when he was completely alone. He didn't care, don't care, don't care, he was so fucking close- It felt so good-

He growled and groaned harshly again and again as the music drowned out his shame.

“ _Huuuuuuuuuuuuuagh_ fuuuUCK yooou-” He stammered as he felt an intense orgasm inching up upon him, his gasps for air as noisy as his pep talks. “Fuck you fuck you fuck you, you fuuuuucccccking stallion BarnEy-”

His orgasm hit him hard and fast. A short blast of ecstasy. Any stronger and his legs would have given out from under him.

Yes yes yes, felt gooood. Fucking fantastic. Such intense tingles and strained flexing muscles. So hardddd. Aaaaaahah...

So good.

So good...

...

The high started to fade.

Freemind huffed and puffed as he leaned his head in his hand. So sweaty, so much effort...

He flipped on the sink and held his messy hand under the running water.

When he returned to his senses, he glanced up. 

He grimaced knowing what was there. What he had jerked off to.

He closed the cabinet only to be greeted with the mirror on the other side. He looked at his hot, bothered and sexually pleased face. It made him gulp hard.

“What am I, a faggot? Pull yourself together, Gordon.”

He stopped the music and washed up.

Whatever, it didn’t really matter. He never regret anything he did.

He knew there was a logical explanation if he really thought about it. One thing was for sure, he was straight. So he could rule anything involving that out.


	2. Pin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another day at work. But the boys are fighting.

Freemind was actually more quiet than anything at work.

If you were to ask anyone about him they’d tell you they barely knew him. Or they’d recall one of many times when he got really irritated. Either because things weren’t being done efficiently or human error occurred. He was the first one to correct them if scientific fact was misstated. But nobody could really complain, especially since his perfectionism made their research run a lot smoother.

A couple of them congregated in the breakroom.

Co-workers were chatting about weekend plans, Freemind tuned them out. He just wanted to make his coffee and maybe spike it with a shot when no one was looking. Then he could go back to counting his endless numbers... Mmm the sweet comfort of general relativity…

Science was the only thing he could put his trust in. Proven facts. Nobody could take that from him. People were unreliable and unpredictable.

He was still thinking about...his personal time. About his own moments of weakness. Man, was he just glad there was no one bothering him. He wouldn’t have to deal with those feelings kicking up again-

“Hey guys!” A familiar voice entered the room and was greeted with several “Hi Barney.”

Freemind shrugged his head into his shoulders. Great.

He ignored him. If he could get this stupid- tiny creamer open then maybe he could slip out before he noticed him. He dumped it in his drink haphazardly. There, now to go-

“Hey Freeman, com'ere.” Calhoun chimed wanting him to join them.

Everyone paused.

...Gordon reluctantly turned around to face them, pretending to be a part of the conversation. He wore his usual frown as he glanced over them. Then ended up staring down and slipped his coffee.

Freemind started to zone out.

The rest of these people meant very little to him. He had no desire to waste his time on them, listening to them talk about their fulfilling lives and sharing their interests irritated him. They brought no value to his life. The only reason he even turned around was because he cared about- ...Well that didn’t matter. He had the societal duty to act polite and civilized sometimes. 

He wasn’t listening. He didn’t care. He just waited to go.

That is until Calhoun put his hand on his shoulder and made him rocket back to reality, tuning in.

“How about it? Ya’ know nobody ever sees you outside work, so you should join us. It’ll be fun. And if anything, I’ll be there to keep you company. You and me.” He elbowed him trying to convince Gordon to come to whatever event they were talking about.

Freemind had to take a second to process it. What? Him and Barney? He wanted them to go together? Firstly, yeah, nobody ever saw him because these squares would rat him out in a second if they knew the kinds of parties he went to. 

Secondly, why would he ever join them? Standing around bullshitting while they bowled or whatever old people did sounded like a good way to bore him to death. Even if Barney was there what was the point? Just so he could talk to him more... Get to spend time together besides the casual encounters between breaks... Might be a nice way to get closer to him...

His thoughts were hijacked by the possibilities and he didn’t like where they were going. You and me, you and me... Wait. Was this what everyone was thinking? The two of them were some kind of pair?? His mind spiraled to judgment and irritation, ‘Why is he touching me- Stop looking at me with those soft eyes of yours-’

Something wasn’t settling right with him and it was evident from his uncomfortable scowl and tinted cheeks. He felt everyone’s eyes carve into him. He felt not in control and it made his paranoia spark violently.

“Fuck off.” Freemind pushed his way past all them and stormed off.

The rest of them stood awkwardly and became quiet for a moment.

One of the other scientists eventually spoke up, “Jeez that guy’s a freak...” The others kind of nodded in agreement.

Barney raised his hands in a motion to stop, “Whoa whoa, the fella is just- probably having a bad day. I'll talk some sense into him.”

Calhoun followed after him. He frowned as he faintly heard them joke about Freemind always being in a shitty mood.

Just because Gordon was a little... _unconventional_ was no reason to outcast him. Was he a pain in the dick sometimes with his stubbornness? Sure. But still they had nice interactions from time to time. Everyone had their demons. And he knew Freemind had his good parts too.

“Gordon?” He stepped into the men’s room. “Are you okay there?”

Freemind flashed him a glare before looking back at the sink again, “Go away.”

“Listen, if the guys said something you didn’t like I’m sure it’s-”

“Tsh- It’s you. Don’t you get it??”

“Uh, what did I do?”

“You’re flirting with me in front of everybody! Ooooh but I’m not going to let it happen!”

“What-?” Barney shook his head and cocked it as if he misheard him.

Flirting? Why did Gordon think he was flirting with him? He was just- talking to him like any one of his other pals. Like someone he considered a friend. “Just cause I’m treating ya nicely doesn’t mean I’m coming onto you-”

Freemind didn’t want to hear it. He got in the guard’s face and shoved him in the chest, “Fuck the Hell off, you incessant worthless asshole!!! I’ll shoot my fucking brains out sooner then I let you seduce and corrupt me! I don’t NEED friends, especially not a fag like you!”

Barney blinked with shock, completely taken back by the unprompted insults. Then his face twisted up with a firm unyielding expression. He had to stop himself from his first reaction, which was to punch Freemind in the face with all his might.

Calhoun grabbed Gordon by a fist full of shirt and slammed him against the bathroom wall. His arm pressed hard across his collar bone pinning him in place. If Freemind thought he stood even two seconds against him in a fight, he was _dead fucking wrong._ It was his goddamn _job_ to protect entitled pricks like him.

“Let’s get shit straight, Freeman.” Barney spoke low but sharply, his accent highlighting his anger, “One. You ain’t _ever._ Gonna call me that again unless you want a swift ass-kicking and us both out of a job.” He glared at him straight in the eyes. “Two. _You’re_ the one that brought up this flirtin’ crap. I never did anything but strike up friendly conversation with ya and try to include you.”

Freemind could never say anything that would break his foundations, Barney had _real_ confidence. He knew who he was and no amount of lip would make him question or be ashamed of that. “If anyone has a problem here, _it’s you._ Check yourself before callin’ me what I should be callin’ _you_.”

He let go of him with a huff. He had some nerve. That’ll put him in his place.

Gordon grinded his teeth avoiding eye contact. His fingers clenching into fists as they shook.

Calhoun was fucking lucky they were on the job right now-! Or else he’d go fucking ape shit on him-!

“ASSHOLE!!!” Furious Freemind turned and kicked the waste bin over making paper towels spill everywhere, he stomped on them and grumbled nonsense having a little meltdown.

Barney just crossed his arms and watched as Freemind sizzled out.

“...Are you done?” The guard rubbed his own forehead, “Jeez. I knew you were always holding ya tongue for some reason but you really have something bizarre going on in that head of yours, huh? Where’d you even come up with this stuff.”

Gordon seemed somewhat composed again. “Shut up.” He couldn’t think of anything else to say for a moment. “Whatever, you can stop talking to me like everyone else. I don’t need the distraction here anyway.” He came to work everyday to get paid. That was it. Not make friends.

“God, loosen up Gordon.” Barney said with a shake of his head. “You might be an explosive douchebag, but I ain’t afraid to deal with you. It’d take a lot more than a couple words to scare me off. We don’t have to be on bad terms, especially when we’re forced to see each other every day. You hear?” He narrowed his eyes, “Doesn’t mean I’ll let you get away with bullshit either though.”

Freemind had his side facing his co-worker and glanced up to catch his own gaze in the mirror. He smirked as his shining pride picked him up again. He rubbed his own beard, “Hah- so you’re really set on this whole... Being friends shtick. So crazy it just might work.”

Barney stared at him. What the actual fuck was he talking about. They’ve literally worked together for like. Years.

He couldn’t roll his eyes any harder if he tried, “Sure Gordon.” This guy really was insane, but it wasn’t a deal breaker. He’d dealt with worse.

Freemind fixed his shirt and casually walked past Barney to the door, but secretly butterflies were fluttering in his chest. Calhoun really _did_ see how great he was. He was sooo desperate to be his friend, it made Gordon have to stifle a laugh. Maybe he wasn’t as stupid as he thought. Perhaps... even _worth_ a moment of his precious precious time.

“We’ll see if your word is really any good. You know where to find me when you want more.” Freemind was stroking himself with his thoughts again and let the door slam.

Barney yelled over his shoulder, “Why don’t you start the convo with me for once, tough guy??” 

He let out a tired sigh. That man was a handful. And definitely not right in the head.


	3. Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bet you won't have a totally platonic smooch session with me, asshole.  
> Unless...?

Calhoun yawned, stretching out his arms as he walked to his car. Another work day done, time to live the life he had outside Black Mesa’s walls.

He was in a good mood and in no rush now that he was off the clock. He tossed his duffle bag in the back seat, turned on the air conditioning, made himself comfortable.

He barely remembered his scuffle with Freemind from a couple days back. 

That is... until his passenger door suddenly opened and he snapped his attention to it- Oh it was just Gordon. Who sat in the side seat for some reason.

Freemind crossed his arms loudly. Even touching a couple pennies in the cup holder that didn’t belong to him.

It was silent for a moment besides the brief metallic jostle of spare change.

He had not invited him for a ride. What the fuck.

Barney wore a confused scowl, who just up and asserts themself in another man’s car!? He didn’t even say anything! This cocky fuck.

He shifted his body to face Gordon and leaned his arm on the back of his own seat. Forced to acknowledge him. “Can uh... I help you with something, Doc?”

Gordon cleared his throat but didn’t look at him. “You want to get a drink sometime or something.”

The guard raised an eyebrow, then picked at his nail with a teasing voice. “Huh. Well, gee. You know. I’m _awfully_ busy lately. You’re gonna have to be a little more specific than that...”

Freemind scoffed and rolled his eyes with his whole head, “Friday.”

He glanced over and saw Calhoun roll his hand in a motion to continue.

“11 p.m., Scott’s bar.”

Barney smirked. Then turned back to his steering wheel, “When ya put it like that, sure. I think I’ll be free.”

“Don’t be late then.” Gordon opened his car side and showed himself out with a firm shut of the door. He shoved his hands in his pockets and grinned once his back was facing him. Hah, fucking nailed it.

Calhoun started laughing to himself as he watched Freemind strut away all proudly. He was _so extra_. It was kind of charming. 

* * *

Over time, the casual bar meet up became a thing for the two men. So much so that Freemind invited his co-worker over to his home to admire his own collection of boozes.

Barney glanced around as he got to investigate where Gordon lived. Yup... this was a man cave. A pretty decent one at that. “Let me use the can first.”

He went to the bathroom. As he washed his hands he looked up at the mirror. Not bad Calhoun... How many years on the job and you still look lively?

Hm, he poked his tongue around his teeth and realized he’d really like a piece of floss.

He opened the mirror and found some. But something unexpected caught his eye. Oh he really shouldn’t be nosy but- Hey that was a picture of him.

Barney couldn’t help a smile. Gordon kept a photo of the two of them...? He didn’t seem like the sentimental type. The fact that this was here really tickled his peach. He must of saw it everyday when getting ready for work.

How oddly sweet...

* * *

“Now this baby... This isn’t for pussies. Blue Label Blended Scotch Whisky.” Freemind tapped one of the bottles from his own home bar, making it tink several times. “American made. Aged 20 years. Traditional recipe. _Rare_.”

Barney was on the sofa chilling with his head resting against the top of the backrest, “Uh huh...” He had a four dollar beer in his hand that he was enjoying. Neither of them were inebriated, just casually buzzed.

Freemind held it up higher and looked at the alcohol softly, this made him feel pretty happy. “Mn good stuff... Bet you’ve never seen even half of these.”

“Yeah, I’m sure they get the job done.” He yawned, “That’s nice. You should've invited me over sooner.”

Gordon snorted meanly, “Alright, stop making shit sound gay man.”

Calhoun lifted his head up. “What’s with you.” He made a face, “Why’s everything about not being gay. I bet if you just kissed a dude _once_ you’d see it isn’t anything to bitch and moan about.”

Freemind put the bottle back, “Psh. I’d never do that because that’s gay and I’m not gay. Idiot.”

“Meh meh meh idiot.” He mumbled under his breath in a mocking tone just to be snarky. “Doesn’t have to be.”

“...What?”

Barney raised his brows not really listening, “Hm?”

Gordon sat next to him, “What do you mean.”

“...Oh uh.” Calhoun shrugged, “Ya’ know. Like, I might have eaten olives on pizza before but that doesn’t mean I like it or I’m ordering it every time. Same shit.” He drank his beer, finishing it and putting the bottle on the table. “Can kiss a dude just to try it and doesn’t mean you have to parade around calling yourself a fruit the rest of ya life.”

He didn’t get everyone’s fascination with _labels._ Just like the scientists at work, they put everything into a category in a category in a category. As if putting him in a section would tell you exactly how he was supposed to act. He was more unique than that. He was his own person. He was Barney.

Freemind stared at the TV as he thought about it, then scoffed. “Yeah right, you do it then.”

“Pardon?”

“Kiss me if it isn’t such a big deal, oh that’s right, you won’t cause you’re too chicken shit.”

Calhoun squinted, turning his body toward him. “Are you challenging me?”

“Just calling bullshit when I see it.” Freemind smirked.

Barney stared at him irritated. “Alright-” The guard shifted, “I’ll let you make a fool outta me. But only because I know for a fact that you’ll chicken out first.”

Sigh, he knew what was gonna happen. He was going to lean in to actually do it and Freemind would have a real reason to call him names. Whatever, he started it.

He put a hand on his shoulder and got close. But to his surprise, Gordon didn’t budge. He glanced up and down Freemind’s stoic expression. He didn’t look angry nor excited, just. Waiting.

Hm. Well. He wasn’t going to be the one to back out. Because in the end kissing other men didn’t really bother him. So Barney tilted his head and closed his eyes giving him a smooch. Mn... maybe he’ll give him a few more. Just cause it felt nice.

Freemind kept his eyes open to stare at him for the first second. Hah- He actually did it. Who could blame him though? Gordon Freeman was irresistible, everyone wanted a piece of him~

Those few extra pecks were enough time to let Freemind’s thoughts wonder. Calhoun’s handsome face was so close... And he was so touch starved. He expected him to pull away any moment but when Barney didn’t, his eyes fluttered shut. Gordon started kissing him back.

They both got lost in the feeling. A hand reached up to steady himself by touching Barney’s chest. Tilting his head and mingling his lips with his more aggressively. 

When Freemind committed to something he did it wholeheartedly, he was an all or nothing kind of man. If he was going to kiss you- He fucking kissed you like he wanted it.

A man full of passion. He didn’t like being shitty at doing stuff, so he simply was not. If it was a skill he wanted, he grabbed it by the horns and beat the shit out of it until he was a master. A quick, smug and advanced learner. Falling ass backwards into innovation because he was just _that fucking confident_ about everything he did.

Even if he fucked up, he tackled the problem until he won or decided on his own account when it wasn’t worth his valuable time anymore.

And kissing his homie was no different. A chasteful press of the lips quickly turned into a more involved make out. His hand grabbing him a little harder to guide Barney where he wanted him. Bodies bending into it as he made it slightly deeper.

Yeah, he was a pretty good kisser if he did say so himself~

This was... nice...

...

Wait a fucking second. He remembered what he was doing.

Freemind put his hand on Calhoun’s face and pushed them apart. He held him there as Barney blinked his eyes open, surprised by the abrupt stop. Gordon was wide eyed and blushed as he checked who he was canoodling with. Yup. Still him.

Fuck, he had actually kissed him, it made his heart do backflips.

Freemind stared to the side, off into a distance that wasn’t there. His frown stretched far across his warm face unsurely.

“Um-” Barney started but Gordon pressed his hand over his mouth.

“Shh. Sh Shhh.” He squeezed his eyes hard a moment, then opened them again. But he still wouldn’t look at his co-worker. “I need to think.”

Barney sighed through his nose as Freemind let go of him. Alright. Fine. He would be patient. He waited as Freemind seemed to slip deep into thought.

Calhoun sat and let his own mind drift. He wasn’t sure what to expect, he wasn’t even sure what he was doing here. Gordon really seemed to leave his comfort zone recently, making the effort to reach out to him and they had hung out a lot more before this.

But all this nonsense about confusing his friendship for flirting, name calling and bets- It left him questioning what Gordon really wanted. Eh, he wasn’t one to overthink things though.

He looked up at Freemind’s face to see if he was ready. He could see the cogs turning in his head, his gaze sharp and brows furrowed in concentration. Not full of rage like usual, it was analytical.

Calhoun felt his eyes soften as he noticed Gordon’s features. The way his hair was arranged to look purposely wild and spiky, his tightly groomed beard, the slightly worn lines in his face from years of hard work, those incredible green eyes... He was a handsome man.

When Freemind finally did come out of his trance, he turned back to Barney. They stared at each other for a minute. “What’s with the face?” He asked.

“What face-” Oh. Oh no. Barney realized his soft thoughts had melted through to his expression. That what had started as a curious gaze turned into an admiring longing stare. 

His cheeks turned hot with embarrassment.

The last thing he wanted to do was force himself on a guy that called him a dirty homo to his face. It didn’t feel right. Didn’t want to catch feelings for someone who thought they couldn’t be friendly without it turning romance. Damn it... He didn’t want to prove all Freemind’s ridiculous fears right.

“Sorry- I should go.” He got up ready to show himself out and haul himself home.

How’d this even happen, he just wanted to get to know him better-

Freemind grabbed his wrist.

Calhoun looked down expecting him to say something, but Gordon never did. “What.”

Freemind turned his head away even more and shrugged his face into his own shoulders. He couldn’t spit anything out. It physically hurt his pride.

Barney made a face, “I’m leaving.”

“Don’t.” Freemind managed.

“Why not??” He was getting annoyed.

“Because... I didn’t get to say what I think yet.”

“...” The negative emotions in Calhoun paused hearing that.

Trying to decipher what was actually going on in Freeman’s mind was like walking a minefield. Barney was starting to think _he_ didn’t even know what was going on in his own head.

He slowly sat back down. But this was becoming painfully awkward for the both of them as Freemind went quiet again.

Barney sighed, “Let’s just... leave things how they are. Okay?” He was really grasping for straws at this point.

Something in Gordon’s face changed.

No no no- If they left off like this he would slip away out of his grip! Things would be weird. He would drift away like everyone else he overwhelmed with his sheer awesomeness. He had to do something- ANYTHING to communicate.

Freemind mumbled, “What I’m trying to say is...” Ugh, fuck he felt light headed. His blood pressure must be through the roof. The closer he got to finishing that sentence, the hotter his face got. He couldn’t do this- 

He grabbed Barney’s shoulders and made himself lean in. Then he had to close his eyes before touching his lips to his again. PLEASE, please just read his actions instead. He was trying so hard to make this clear. It wasn’t his fault that Barney was too dumb to know what he wanted without spelling it out for him!

He was stiff and uncomfortable but this idiot forced him to elaborate! He wanted Barney to stay with him, he just refused to say it. _PLEASE_ God he wanted this!!!

Calhoun glanced around hesitantly being pressed against. He was getting a lot of mixed signals but... If Gordon was doing this of his own will, he didn’t see any harm in continuing.

Besides... He knew Freemind was the type of guy that wouldn’t hold back the moment something he didn’t like happened. He would let him know with every insult and curse word in the book.

Barney took comfort in that thought and soon gently held Freemind’s sides, kissing him back.

Gordon relaxed a little when his gesture was returned. Finally... He just wanted to do and not explain. His grip turned soft and the exchange became more natural again.

Right. He wasn’t gay just- running an experiment. Yeah...


	4. Fuck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning: Freemind pushes himself to be sexually uncomfortable / might be a masochist and he doesn’t tell Barney right away because he’s an asshole.
> 
> Anyway, in case it isn’t clear, this is consensual. We all know they’re dying to fuck each other. If this isn’t your thing there will be soft sex next chapter. Cheers.

Two guys exchange a tipsy kiss to see what it’s like and things carry on normally for a while.

That is… until one night, an experiment gets much more thorough than anticipated.

Freemind dug his fingers into Barney’s back as they kissed. Clawing at him with the want and passion of a couple on a honeymoon. There was nothing chaste about how they were touching each other, and Freemind wasn’t gentle about his approach. Everything about their body language screamed that they wanted each other. The kissing, the grabbing, the grinding. The way he couldn’t seem to put his hands on him enough. Their escalating noises becoming less and less shy.

It kept building to the point where Barney pinned Freemind between his body and a table. Gordon rubbed his ass against Calhoun’s boner relentlessly as if saying ‘Come here big boy, you know you want it.’

Barney held him against his body, kissing the back of his neck and hotly inching his hands where they didn’t belong. Under his pants then under his boxers. Touching him up, heated skin to skin. Freemind had started all of this by being too handsy. Pushing his lust to the forefront of his mind where it mixed dangerously with his trait of being way too overbearing.

But there was still that little voice in the back of his head. Ohhh God this was weird, just knowing another man was doing this to him- His clothes were what was acceptable for other people to see him in... and without that boundary things were becoming much more real.

“MmmNh-” Yet noises like that kept escaping him. His hands felt good, he pressed against him harder when his fingers slid in the creases where his thighs and groin met.

Then he started to undress them, whether it was a tug of Freemind's pants or the ruffling of his co-worker revealing himself behind him. It made his face hot thinking bout Bareny’s bare cock just out of his sight- It also brought an intense uneasiness.

He heard the tear of a condom wrapper and Calhoun played with his ass.

Freemind’s chest beat wildly, the more Barney touched him, the more anxiety started to swirl around.

Agh no- He wasn’t a bitch! He could handle anything!!! He wanted Barney so badly so why was a tense ball forming in his chest...?

His dick slid against him and he almost jumped. His excitement mixed with some other emotion... fear? No it was more complicated than that... He bit his lip, quickly feeling more sweaty than he should be.

Hah, was he nervous?? What was he nervous about??? This was what he wanted! I-it didn’t matter if he was a man and... and...

Barney gave him a warning of what was coming next and Freemind froze up.

As he entered him, a deep shiver ran through his body that made his skin crawl. Suddenly the reality of what was happening to him was extremely vivid. It was agonizing and a turn on at the same time.

Gordon's hands clasped over his mouth, fingertips clenching hard into his own face. A silent gasp of his mouth underneath. He needed to contain himself as the feeling of someone inside him overwhelmed all his other senses. He only felt that pressure and it had completely stopped the gears in his head.

He wasn’t sure if he was trying to stop screams or moans or the mix of the two from coming out as Calhoun started to move.

Several emotions he couldn’t describe rushed over him. He felt tears start to well up in his eyes and then hE REMEMBERED MEN DON’T CRY AND SUCKED THOSE MOTHERFUCKERS BACK IN! YOU STAY IN THERE, LIQUID.

FUCK this was happening.

Oooh he hated the idea... but it felt good... Much more than he was honestly expecting. And that thought brought some guilt with it.

When he came out of his initial shock, he bit his lip and put a hand on the table. The other grabbed his own twitching penis. He’d never felt so hard in his life! He didn’t have a clear idea of how he felt about this. He adored Calhoun, all he ever dreamed of for a long time was a night like this. Yet the nature of the act they were committing made his stomach turn.

His inner dialogue was interrupted when he heard Barney. His soft grunts of effort as he held his hips, trying to find his rhythm. It made his body light up in a completely different way. A pleasant shiver this time.

It quickly dawned on him that Calhoun was a part of this... He would remember this, he would know what happened, he would see all Freemind’s pleasure. He was actually _here_ experiencing this with him, not some wild fantasy that he could easily brush off later.

That thought made the sickness in his guts churn worse.

But the most troubling thing was flutters mixing in with the knot in his core. That all of this was accompanied by feelings of caring deeply for the person touching him. His entire self image as an undeniable straight man was shattering.

There was so much trust he had to put in Barney right now. Trust he had never had to give before with any other person because this act was rooted deep deep in his insecurities. Trusting wasn't an easy thing for him to do.

Barney... He was letting Barney in not only physically but in a place where he had power over him, the ability to hurt what he feared most- his feelings.

Panic grabbed a hold of him for a moment as he felt extremely vulnerable. Oh my god, he wasn’t ok he wasn’t ok he wasn’t ok he wasn’t ok-

A muffled plea he was trying to contain accidentally escaped through clenched teeth, "Stop...!"

Calhoun’s heart dropped, freezing immediately. As a gentle and caring person, that was not something you wanted to hear. "What’s wrong- Are you okay??" Oh my fucking god, don’t say he read all of Freeman’s advances _wrong-_ The guy had been practically ripping his clothes off him a minute ago!

Freemind looked over his shoulder with a wide eyed pissed off scowl and threw his arm back to sink his fingers into Barney so he wouldn’t leave. 

"What are you retarded!? Don’t actually stop!" He demanded frantically, he was so fucking embarrassed but he didn’t care! “I didn’t come this far to have you PUSSY OUT! I don’t care what I say or do- DON’T FUCKING STOP!!!”

He couldn’t hold it back anymore, if this didn’t happen now he would _fucking DIE_ of horniness. Give it give it give it give it-! He didn’t care how weird the act made him feel, if it was Barney he WANTED IT.

Calhoun gulped, having a moment of doubt. “I just wanna know if you’re okay with this! You never _said-_ ”

Gordon let go and balled his fists. Slamming them on the table like an animal, “No, I’m not fucking _‘oKAy wiTH THis’_ alright!?” He replied in a mocking voice, this was destroying every straight stanning cell in his body. “What am I supposed to do when I’m _furious_ all I ever think about is _you!?”_

Barney blinked at him bewildered, still frozen in place.

Freemind stared daggers into him, “You really think I’d let any asshole lay even one digit on me without me _wanting it!?_ I’M GORDON FUCKING FREEMAN! I would rip into you so fast you’d be reduced to a quivering pathetic pile of cells and atoms!” 

His tone was that with the intent to murder Calhoun if he didn’t get the fucking hint. “My decisions are _flawless_ every single time! And I say you’re going to use that sorry little cock of yours _right. fucking. now_.”

A hot and slightly frightened shiver shot through Barney having Freemind make such a harsh sounding, confident threat. Wha-

He stared at Gordon and noticed his body language again. He was huffing as if outta breath. His expression pissed off but flushed with anticipation. An arm was busy, pumping something beneath him. Freemind spoke one more time. “Move it.”

Calhoun blinked. Then his face melted into a heated knowing smirk. Oh... _OH..._ It finally clicked. Gordon was one of _those_ kinds of “straight” guys. It’d kill him to actually _ask_ for anything. All his bullshit finally made sense.

Hahaha... Ohhhh Barney's whole body filled with the sudden power he held over Freemind. Any restraint he was holding onto vanished, he didn’t have to second guess himself anymore. He was going to _fuck_ the homophobia right out of him.

He raised a brow and leaned over Gordon to get his soft voice as close to his ear as possible. “Alright then.” A hand slipped under his shirt and slid up his back in a sensual rub. A shiver ran through him.

"Would you like a safe word, darling~?" Barney whispered teasingly.

Freemind swung his free arm up threatening to elbow the guard in the face, "Don't fucking _ever_ call me _darling_ when your _dick is in my fucking ass!_ " He hissed through his teeth. "And safe words are for _pussies-_ Just let me have this!"

Barney couldn't help but laugh, he'd never seen such an overly defensive man in his entire life. But he liked that even when he literally had him bent over a table 6 inches deep in his ass, Freemind had this unbreakable confidence. He was so stupid and smart at the same time. And that was so so sexy of him.

"The safe word is banana."

“I’m not saying fucking _banana._ Pick a better one!” Gordon whined.

"You'll just have to suck it up for once and say it if you _actually_ hate this."

Freemind's dick throbbed hearing that from him and jumped as he rammed him hard, sinking his rod into him all the way to the base. Freemind howled, "You motherFUCKER-!"

Gordon’s complaints evaporated into moans as he railed him without hesitation.

Unbelievable- How DARE this lowly cunt think he could talk to HIM that way! He _hated_ Calhoun for infecting him with his-- HOMOSEXUALITY. But his head screamed that this was all he wanted! More more more!

He hated it- He loved it- He _hated_ it- He _loved_ it-!

Freemind lost himself briefly and cried out in a pleased voice, "Fuck you gay boy, f-fuck you for feeling so good...!"

He was so angry and so horny and so shame ridden, but mostly horny. It was just so goddamn pleasurable and satisfying to let out all these emotions at once. His entire life he held them in his disturbing little head with no outlets besides staring at his lonely bathroom cabinet.

He was so immensely attracted to him. Maybe even more than to himself.

His once harsh tone was melting against his will, he could barely think let alone talk. He leaned on his arm to brace himself as Calhoun slammed into him mercilessly. Every thrust pushing more and more unrestrained noises out of him. Every pump of his own hand feeling _so good..._

Barney was expending a lot of energy seeing that, per usual, the only thing Freemind was good at was jerking himself off. But he found time between his heavy breaths to fuck with Gordon even more.

"Go on, fucking say it. Say that one safe word and I'll stop right now. I'll never touch you with these strong rough hands again. You say that word and I'll know you're not just a filthy liar trying to protect your pride."

Freemind shook his head and tried to hide his face in his free hand. Making Barney grab him by a fist full of hair and yank him up, earning a pained ecstatic groan from Freemind. 

" _I hate you..._ " Gordon spit out with a blistering rage being pushed. His face having turned an extra violent shade of red.

"Fucking prove it, pussy! Say that fucking word! _Right. Now_. And I'll never even _lay eyes_ on you again. You’ll never _feel_ me again." He pulled his hair harder, making Freemind let out a yell and dig his nails into the table. The angle Calhoun held him at being a painful test of flexibility on his spine. " _Answer me. Are you going to say it?_ "

Freemind boiled as he couldn’t even look away. This motherfucker...was so goddamn hot. Finally, his brows creased in defeat. "No..."

Barney shoved Gordon’s head down letting go and his smirk grew into a full blown smile. It made him so hard having Freemind _finally_ be straightforward. "That’s what I fucking thought. Because you loooove it. You _love_ when big mean Barney comes and makes all those gay little feelings bubble up inside you. _Admit it._ "

Freemind pressed his forehead against the table, hiding from the truth. "SHUT UP shut up shut up, shut the hell upp shut u-uuuUghupp h-hhuh uaaaup-" He was overtaken with painful sounding groans as an orgasm took him by surprise. Hearing Barney say that was too much...

But Calhoun wouldn’t allow him to rest peacefully, he hooked his arm around Gordon’s neck and pulled him up in a headlock. Pressing Freemind’s back to his torso, “Did I say you could finish!? I’m not _done_ with you!”

“Oouhh _fuck...!_ ” Freemind moaned in a strained voice. That line shot through him like a fucking machine gun, intensifying his nut further.

Oh god, he was done but still being hammered like crazy! It felt like his fucking DICK was going to pop off Calhoun was ramming him so hard. He never had someone still going so forcefully post his orgasm.

He clawed at Barney’s arm around his neck, completely losing it as pleasure shook him. “Make it stooooop, I’m going to die!!” He whined.

“Oooh stop being so dramatic!” Barney spit out, really fighting to get enough breaths in. He was over exerting himself but he felt too amazing to not see this all the way through. “I would _never_ let that happen.”

Man seeing Freemind like this was only enabling him to let out some of his own bundled up emotions. It took so much self control to not slap Gordon into place sometimes, especially when he steps on the line. Mmmn, having him submit to him pleased his own selfish desires.

Freemind wore an intensely pleased and dizzied face just savoring the feeling of Barney inside him. So gross... But at the same time he never wanted this feeling to end. “Y-you.. Udgh...” He swallowed and tried again. “You did this to me...”

Calhoun switched his grip on him once more, holding him by the arms and bending him over. Trying to find the way that took the least effort to ram as he was starting to get tired. "You're a sick sick little man. I can only imagine how much you want this to be my fault. But you’re in control baby, even if you won’t admit it~"

It was true. If he could blame Barney, Gordon could have the best of both worlds- He could keep his straight card and get that sweet sweet ass fucking. A fantasy that he knew couldn’t come true.

Freemind moaned miserably into the table as he felt heat surging through his loins again-

Uh- A-again...!? He... he was going to orgasm again??

What- He wasn’t even able to reach his dick, how did he feel so close when he wasn’t even being jerked off anymore-

He had a realization. He didn’t need his cock stroked to cum.

Freemind’s face twisted into an amused grin, “Hohoho- You f-fucking bitch- You’re really going to make me come _the gay way_ too? Just to rub my face in it? Fuck yoooou u-ugghhn...!”

Calhoun was too busy getting lost in his own heat to reply, his hips giving their final thrusts as they orgasmed.

Ough... The intense pleasing tingles radiated through them. Fuck that was taxing on the both of them, going hard and being pounded even harder. It left the two men breathing as if they had just ran a marathon. Each sweaty and shaky in their own rights.

Eventually, Barney retracted himself from him and gave him a little pat on the butt.

Freemind huffed, still catching his breath and reveling in what just happened. He tiredly tugged up his pants so he could turn around and sit on the table. He grabbed Calhoun by the collar and pulled him forward into a thank you kiss.

Then when they parted, he tightened his hold on him. He scowled and lowered his voice, sharp enough to kill on its own. "You will never. _Ever._ Tell anybody about this. I don't fuck men. And I _especially_ don't bottom. For _anyone._ "

Barney just grinned happily with half lowered eyelids, knowing he was full of shit. “Oh, I won’t.”

“...Good.” Freemind visually relaxed his shoulders and leaned his head back exhausted.

“Ya know. Unless you give me a really good reason to.”

Gordon snapped his head back up and his angry eyes widened, they stared at each other for a while. “Tsh... I should have never let you in.”

“A little late for that now, darling.”


	5. Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The dance of passion and encouragement.

It was Saturday, a day where those few lucky workers got their time off from Black Mesa. And Barney had decided to spend it with someone. 

He knocked on the door, fully prepared to get bullied for showing up too early or hear some comment on how he liked to spend his spare time in some run-down jeans and a button up. Or maybe Freemind would make fun of the type of alcohol he brought. Hah, he wasn’t going to spend hundreds of bucks on some old juice. Gordon would just have to settle this time.

The door opened fairly quickly and despite his mental preparation- Calhoun was surprised. Freemind was dancing. He was wearing loose long shorts and only a gray undershirt on top, his discman strapped to him hands-free via a belt carrying case. No it’s not a fanny pack, shut your mouth- it’s 1999 and it’s soooo cool and innovative to be able to walk around listening to music without holding your cd player, shut up-

His shoulders are rocking back and forth to an upbeat 80s alternative album. Unlike his metal CDs, it does not incite a rageful energy but a happy confident one. His ass sways to the song as he pulls him inside. “Bout time you got here.”

Barney gave him the usual greeting and stepped in, taking his gift out and tossing his bag aside. But he was dumbfounded as he watched Freemind go back to what he was doing. Grooving his little heart out in the kitchen while he finished up putting clean dishes away, a loud hum and a mumble of lyrics escaping him every so often. His body moving with the confidence of someone in the middle of the dance floor at a club.

For a moment he couldn’t take his eyes off him. How Calhoun could tell he was feeling himself up without literally doing so- The way he was moving his body was so. _Sexual._ As if the music was compelling him, inflating an ego that was already so full that now it was overflowing out of him in the form of movement.

Barney slowly grew a smile as Gordon finally turned his attention back to him. They caught eyes as he strut his way over. Freemind biting his lip and tongue poking out when he licked over his front teeth. Oh man, he was vibing _hard_ to the melody being pumped into his head.

Calhoun was tempted to start wiggling himself from the sheer energy this man was putting out. He followed Gordon with his eyes as he came over, watching him mouth some words singing along, passing by and stepping behind him-

Freemind slaps Barney’s ass hard with a noisy thwap.

He gasped being caught off guard and nearly throws his wine, “ _Christ_ Gordon! I have to use that Monday...” Rubs his sore butt cheek.

He flashes him a wide grin, “What are you waiting for, asshole?? Strip down!”

Calhoun starts laughing, “I just got here! We haven't even drank yet-”

“Don’t care~” Freemind snatches the bottle out of his hands and sets it down on the counter. Shoving him against the closest wall. “You should be so lucky I let you visit when I’m in an _extra_ good mood.”

Barney raised his brows almost flustered with how straight forward his approach was today. But there was no time to answer back as Gordon eagerly pressed his lips against his.

He could hear the jams coming from his headphones a little more clearly now as his hands assaulted him and pressed their bodies together.

Well then, Barney certainly wasn’t going to argue with that.

* * *

The men had lost their clothes and found their way to his bed.

Calhoun has his arms behind his head resting them comfortably, he laid on his back propped up enough to watch Freemind busy at work. Doing his own thing as he fucked him in the ass.

He was just...fascinated observing Gordon in his natural element. His music still fueling him, cd player laying beside Barney. His sexy little dance was now used to thrust into him with pizazz. It was really quite a little show, having his eyes eat up his naked bod and it be very clear Freemind was feeling himself up hard.

In the end, Barney was just glad he was doing the work this time cause he had a lot more energy than he did. And he was having fun bouncing around while Calhoun got to relax.

He liked this...casual strange sex they were having. It was new and interesting- Everything about Gordon was strange, new and interesting. Always bursting with high emotions and action. Entertaining at the least.

Barney smiled as he heard some lyrics escape him every now and again, the faces Gordon was making were so heated on their own. He was enjoying himself immensely from the looks of it and that was good enough for now.

Then, the soft noises from the headphones stopped. “Oh.” Freemind squints at the discman as the album finishes and his jams go silent. “Tsh, there goes my rhythm.”

Barney hums in response. Leaning an arm forward, he hooks a finger and throws off his headphones, “Why don’t you let me be your music for a while?” He offers.

Freemind thinks back on all his fantasies for a moment... then answers bluntly, “You’re too quiet...”

Barney tilts his head, clearing his throat. “Well.” His hand wanders down to roughly press along Gordon’s collarbone and shoulder, “What do you want to hear?”

Freemind glances aside unsurely, “Jeez I don’t know.” He didn’t want Barney giving him some half-assed acting if he asked for something really wild. Wouldn’t be rewarding if he didn’t earn the screams outta him.

Calhoun nodded to himself thoughtfully...alright he’ll try some things out. “You’re doing a good job.”

“Naturally.” Gordon agreed.

“Very sexy watching you dance around.”

“Only the sexiest.”

“Yeah I like it when you do that, uh...daddy?” Barney added questionably, some people found that hot right?

Freemind made a face. Oh no, like... Gordon enjoyed calling himself daddy in the moment but it was strange coming from Barney. He shook his head ‘No’ and the other man looked relieved.

“Oh good, cause that one makes me kinda soft hearing myself.” Calhoun chuckled. His sweet genuine laughter filling the room for a moment.

Freemind bit his lip, “It’s kind of nice...hearing you laugh.”

Barney’s heart fluttered, rarely getting compliments from him. He finds his head full of sweeter things he wants to tell Gordon. His eyes going soft, “You feel really good right now...”

“Oh yeah?” Freemind licked his lip hungrily, staring him down like prey. “You likin’ it? You like what you see?”

Calhoun’s relaxed composure didn’t match Gordon’s tone, “I do.”

Freemind’s energy surged again, “That’s right you do, that’s because you never had anybody like me before. I’m the full package plus more.” He was super into what he was saying. As always.

A few more chuckles escaped Barney between groaning breaths being fucked harder, “I’m pretty sure you like hearin’ yourself talk more than me.” He creased his eyebrows a little as his hand slid up the side of Gordon’s neck and tenderly stroked his jaw with a thumb. “Do uh... Do I do anything for ya...?”

Freemind’s wicked smirk melted off as Calhoun’s gentle toned beckoned him to be serious for once. His eyes flashed, a little nervous. “...Of course.”

“Really?”

Freemind looked aside, the fingers holding his leg getting slightly antsy and nodding.

Barney searched his face wanting a little bit more, “Can you tell me what you like about me?”

“Um.” Freemind went quiet as he gathered a response but then his thrusts stopped abruptly and he made a slightly pained expression as he stopped himself, “N-no.” He spit out with an embarrassed half smile, “Because if I do, I’m going to bust.”

Calhoun’s shaft twitched hearing that, if he had any softness in his boner before it was gone now. Barney took his hand back to hold his own face as his expression turned more heated. “O-oh... Fuck Gordon.”

Was he serious? Was just the thought of him enough to almost push him over the edge like that? He was such a shit talker... He would have never guessed he meant anything to him. Let alone _that much-_

He didn’t quite believe it, but that was such a bizarre reaction for Freemind of all people to have- it _had_ to be genuine right? Oooh it made his body tingle more sensitively at the thought.

Gordon sighed, resuming his movement. But seeing he could unravel Calhoun with kindness gave him the courage to be a little more vulnerable. “I can’t stand it Barney, I hate that you’re able to bring a God to their knees...” He admitted making his face get redder than it already was. “When I think about you, it makes me wonder how someone could make me feel so...different. I thought I had everything I ever wanted already but you... I’m _always_ thinking about you.”

Calhoun hid his mouth as an odd shivering noise left him, “Ahhh hah... I-I never thought you’d actually be earnest with me- especially now...”

Freemind raised his brows as if surprised this was working. He grew a big lovey dovey smirk and pulled one of Barney’s wrists away, “Hey~ don’t hide from me now baby. I want to see that hot face you’re making~ It turns me on so much knowing I can get you to make such handsome little faces.”

Calhoun was forced to show the gentle horny expression he was wearing, Gordon’s thrusts were suddenly registering much louder. The friction grew much warmer in his lower regions.

“You’re...just sayin’ that...” Barney denied.

“Oh? Big bad Calhoun thinks I’m just blowing smoke up his ass? Would I do this then-?”

Gordon was salivating from all this juicy talk and licked up his hand, then wrapped a fist around Barney’s cock. Tugging it generously like he would his own.

The guard arched his back as Freemind finally got a loud pleasured moan out of him, “Damn it Gordon, now I’m close...” His breath became more ragged as proof.

“Yeeeah that’s what I want to hear...” He cooed very satisfied with that response. But fuck- the way Barney reacted was really threatening to stop Freemind short. This felt way waaay better when Calhoun was falling apart underneath him. He would have to be clever if he was going to out last him.

He licked his lips as they were getting dried out from breathing through his mouth, “You know what would be better than talking? Why don’t you be a good sexy man and _come for me._ You’d look and sound _so so good_ if you could do that right now...~”

His sultry voice beckoned him to let go and feel the pleasure at its fullest, “Don’t make me have to squeeze it out of you. I know you’re a good boy who knows how to~ It’d make me sooo happy. Fuck, it’d just drive me up the wall in the best. way. possible.”

Calhoun quickly beat Freemind for who had the hardest blushing face. He didn’t know _why_ but hearing Gordon talk to him like that was really really doing it for him- Maybe it was the confidence in his voice or the sheer unexpected nature of this all, but Freemind sounded like he really _wanted him._ Ohh that was doing unspeakable things to Barney... From the constant push and pull of arguing and butting head to _this._ It was too loving and indulgent for him to handle for long.

“F-fuh...fuuuck..” Barney huffed out, a hand still hovering by his own cheek in a shy manner. But his fingers were curled up and half lidded eyes watched Gordon intensity. His heated expression clear for him to see. “Say my name...”

Freemind was walking a dangerous line inching closer and closer himself, “Do i-it for me Barney, blow your load all over my goddamn hand... _My Barney. Do it for me._ ”

He jerked him faster. Fuuuuucking hell he was holding back his own orgasm by a fucking thread...! Do it cunt, god do it do it! Freemind refused to have Calhoun one up him again...!

Luckily, Barney was happy to embrace the encouragement fueled finish as it washed over him. It was such a warm, soft feeling to have an orgasm pushed on by fluffy emotions instead of only desperate stimulation. It showed as his eyes rolled shut and his body was racked by gentle convulsions, his moan full of delight.

The moment Freemind saw Barney lose it, he nut on the spot. “uGH YES-!” He croaked out in an uncontrollable groan, ecstatic he had won. He didn’t even caaare about all the embarrassing stuff he saidddd- Oooooh baby it felt soooo goooood...

* * *

Barney was tired but happy, fighting to keep his eyes open for a little while longer... They were under a blanket, Freemind cuddled up to him and lying his head on his chest. Drool about to dribble out of his mouth onto Barney as he was on the verge of passing out.

Calhoun ran his hand up and down Freemind’s bare back soothingly. But more because he had things on his own mind. He really... He was really catching feelings for this guy hard...

“Hey Gordon...” He said quietly.

“HUh-?” Despite his gentle voice, Freemind lifted his head with the panic of someone who just got yelled at. “What, what do you want?”

“Do you really like me?” Barney asked softly, hand now stroking his lover’s hair.

Gordon’s face crinkled up being bothered with a question like that now- Bleh whatever, he was too sleepy to be self conscious. “Yeah, stupid.” He yawned and adjusted himself to nuzzle his face up into Barney’s neck. “No more talking.”

“Alright.” Calhoun accepted that was probably the best answer he would get out of him. And seeing the way Gordon sighed deeply, pressing against him for protection-

That was all the reassurance he needed.


	6. Limits and Low points

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning for sexual discomfort again, drunkenness and gun mention.
> 
> This chapter... Oh man hehe. Barney is a protective lover who's always looking out for Freemind's best interest. Let's just say I didn't expect borderline masturbation to get as intense as it did. Good thing hand jobs and hurt/comfort go hand in hand. Wink~

Freemind sat face to face with Barney’s junk. And boy was he _uncomfortable._

This was Gordon’s idea of course, he led Calhoun up to this point. Convincing him that he needed to get more familiar with him and he could do it in the form of a blowie-

But every time he looked at the other man’s penis a shot of wild perturbation shook his nerves. He couldn’t ignore what it was. So he just sat there on his knees in front of his friend who was sitting on the bedside.

Something about this act was _so much worse_ for him. Doing shit to his ass was invasive sure, but having a cock _in his mouth??_ His mouth where he tasted things and felt things against his tongue and talked to express himself- Just imagining what a dick hitting the back of his throat might feel like almost made him gag.

Not to mention being at this low angle, being able to see Barney look over him, feeling so so so _beneath him._ He couldn’t take it, it was making his body scream as if he was putting a gun to his head. Like things were crawling under his skin. Like he was small and defenseless.

But that was _so stupid._ He knew Calhoun wasn’t a physical threat to him, that he was safe in his own home, that he was doing this because he wanted to try. So he refused to accept that his discomfort was a reason to stop.

Yet he couldn’t hide the fact that his face looked sick and Barney grew concerned.

“Um... on second thought. I don’t want you to force yourself to be this uncomfortable.” He zips up his pants and adjusts himself, no cock for you.

Gordon raised his brows as if shocked by that statement, “No I’m not! I’m FINE. I WANT to do it, and I know you want it!” He barked insisting, his face twisting up in irritation cause he felt like he was being rushed.

Barney creased his brows. “Look at your hands.”

Freemind finally noticed the way his arms were shaking and clenched his fists to stop them. In control, in control... He was in control, not his paranoia. As much as he was willing to fight to overcome it, he simply wasn’t giving himself any breaks. He held himself to such high standards and demands, it was incredibly damaging to his mind.

He didn’t care about pushing himself too far.

“NO I going to do this just- give me a fucking second!!!”

He was getting really angry with himself now. All he could do was keep saying things, trying to convince himself as he stared at his clenched fists. But for the life of him, he wouldn’t move. His body refused. He had no mercy for himself, kept saying awful things in his head, trying to force himself to do something that honestly. Made him want to throw up.

But he wouldn’t let it go because he _wanted_ to experience things with Calhoun as strongly as it made him feel disgusted. He wanted to give Barney everything so why couldn’t hE FUCKING DO THIS!?!?!?

If he did nothing the horniness killed him, if he forced himself further he’d have a mental breakdown. He absolutely _loathed_ that he was trapped in this- INBETWEEN. Just pick one damnit!!!

“AAAAGH!!!” He practically screamed as he ripped himself away in the other direction, getting up on his feet and pacing off away from him.

“Stupid stupid stupid!” He punched the wall enraged.

Then he grabbed his hair, not noticing the weird noise that left him. He was slipping- slipping somewhere dark. Somewhere agonizing that he didn’t want to be. He had no logical brain here, it was all emotions.

He needed to get a grip... but then Barney walked over.

“Hey, easy.” Calhoun comforted, “You don’t have to push yourself this hard, it’s okay.”

“No no NO, it’s NOT OKAY.”

“It’s fine! Really, it’s completely fine if you can’t do it-”

That really whipped Freemind into a frenzy, “I can FUCKING DO IT!! I CAN DO IT, YOU’RE NOT GIVING ME THE CHANCE!!!”

“Gordon settle down!” He reached out a hand about to touch him.

Freemind sharply turned away before he could. “OOOOOH Go away- Get the _fuck_ away from me! I’m _warning you..._ I’m- I’m so fucking angry-!”

“Gordon...”

He was being consumed by rage and he said one last thing out of desperation when he didn’t hear footsteps, “Banana.”

Calhoun stopped. Oh... Their safeword. Freemind was trying to be serious. To get him to listen when he said to back off...

It dawned on Barney. Freemind had also used the phrase ‘Go away’ when he had followed him into the bathroom at work. And when he didn’t, it ended with Freemind verbally attacking him.

Yet when he was grabbing at Barney wantingly, he never said that. No matter how angry he got when being teased during intimate moments, he never accidentally told him to go away when he really wanted him to stay.

Barney withdrew and stepped back. Sigh... He knew that trying to argue with someone when they were this emotional only led to them getting angrier. So as much as he wanted to comfort him, he needed to let Freemind have space. Listen to him when he was shouting desperately to be left alone with his words and body language. 

Calhoun went back to the bed and took a seat, only looking over to keep his eye on Freemind when he heard him hit the wall every now and again.

It was important to have patience... especially when Freemind was making such an effort to have some self control over his rage.

Barney eventually laid down and rested his eyes. He wasn’t sure how much time passed when he felt the bed buckle again. He looked over to see Freemind sit, grab a pillow and scream into it as he flopped over.

“Need a cuddle?” Calhoun offered, but he was only answered with another indecipherable whine. He turned over so he could drape an arm onto his bedmate. “I’m here if you need me.” He closed his eyes and began to doze off.

* * *

“Hey, yooou up?” Freemind leaned over his man and poked him a bit. “I’m ready.”

Barney had fallen asleep and stirred being bothered, “What...?” He answered, still not really awake.

“I’m ready to suck your cockk.”

Calhoun laid still for a second trying to process what he heard, “...What??” He sat up and rubbed his eyes open.

“What’re you deaf? Dick- dick sucking, imma choke on your rod or whatever fags do.” Freemind mumbled on, lifting his pricey mixed whiskey and taking a big swig of the half empty bottle. “Come on come on, before I wimp out again.”

“No, I’m not-” Barney takes the drink from him, pretty sure this thing was unopened the last time he saw it. “Why are you hammered?? I’m not letting you do anything.”

“No no, this isn't even close to drunk.” A very inebriated Freemind argued, “One time I downed like- an entire thing of Spirytus Vodka. And did all this other stuff I can't tell you about. But I was sooo blacked out I woke up the next day in a dumpster.” He lets out a laugh, “That shit was fucking crazy.”

Barney shakes his head... There was no way he was letting Gordon do something he might regret or won’t remember. It would weigh too heavy on his conscience. “Jeez... I’ll give you a hug, come here.”

Drunk Freemind is pretty quick to follow commands. He sits on Barney and rubs his cheek against his in an affectionate head bump. But he ends up burying his face in his shoulder with an upset noise.

“I’m SO sexy, why doesn’t everybody want to fuck me...?”

Barney rubbed his back with a little empathetic smile, “I fucked you.”

“Yeah...” He said through a hiccup and let his hands wander the other man’s shirt. “You're the only one that hasn't ditched me afterwards.” He mumbles, “Not that I wanted more with those whores anyway... They didn't see how cool I was like you do.”

“Like me?” Barney asked, wanting him to elaborate.

“Yeah you actually... WANT to talk to me.”

“Of course I do. You’ve been my friend for a long time.”

It went quiet for a while.

“Baaarneeeyyy...” He fussed.

“What?”

“I’m hard.”

“Okay??” Calhoun answered amidst a laugh, “Thanks for sharing.”

“No-” Freemind groaned upsetly, “I want- You do something about it!”

“Do I have to?” Barney replied loosely, joking around with him a bit.

Gordon went quiet with thought. “...P-....Please?”

Calhoun froze up, did his ears deceive him? Or was that just the most unexpected cutest voice he ever heard out of Gordon? His expression bunched up with a fluttery smile, “Oh... I can’t say no when you ask like that.” His voice melting with softness.

He put Freemind down on the bed beside him and leaned over to grab something. “Look, this is called lubeee. Have you ever bought any, mister spit hands??” Barney teased as he waved a little bottle around for his pal to see.

“???” Freemind squinted at him, misunderstanding as he looked at his own palms. “I don’t have spit on me!”

Calhoun just shook his head trying to hold back giggles. Man he was really out of it, but he didn’t want to leave him hanging so... He decided to give him a helping hand. “Hold still.”

He took Freemind’s hand and put a dollop of lube in it, the drunk man stared at it as Barney got himself situated. “What the fuck... You put this here.” Gordon corrected.

“Mhm.” Barney hummed as he carefully held his hand to keep him from spilling it, turning Freemind to tuck him against his body as a little spoon. He pulled Gordon’s pants and opened his legs a bit.

“So you weren’t lying.” Calhoun said jokingly as he saw his boner pop out, “Are you ready?” He warned as he held the back of Gordon’s hand with his own. His finger slotted between his as he guided his open palm to hold his own cock.

Freemind’s breath hitched in a gasp, “It’s cold!!” He complained.

“Only for a second, darling.” Barney cooed as he reminded him how to jerk off. “See? Doesn’t that feel nice? You’ve done this before.” He wouldn’t believe him if he said he didn’t. Barney made his hand move up and down, his fingers pressing into his shaft since Freemind was barely holding himself.

“O-oooh mnh- y-yes...” Gordon eased up relaxing into him.

Calhoun smiled as he made the other man shift around in pleasure. There was something unmistakably cutesy about Freemind right now that he couldn’t quite place his finger on... Maybe the difference was that he was missing that harsh ping of judgment in his voice. Or maybe he was actually chilling the fuck out for once. Whatever the case was... it made the guard’s heart go extra soft.

“There you go. You're doing such a good job.” Calhoun gently praised. 

Freemind started panting. “Uhhh- huuuhh- I’m... goood job...”

All Gordon ever did was praise himself when they did stuff together, he knew very well that’s what he liked to hear- This could be a good chance to try a different kind of sex talk though. “Do you like it? Am I making you feel good Gordon? Tell me how much you want it.” He tugged him faster.

“Yes...! Oh fuck yes!!!” Freemind squirmed restlessly, having his quick pace and voice spike a wave of joy into him. “OOOOHHH _BARNEY-!_ ”

Calhoun’s heart leapt out of chest and he accidently stopped jerking him as that extra loud moan made his ears burn. He swallowed back a strangled noise losing his own voice. H-holy shit... _Never_ had he imagined Freemind being even _capable_ of sounding like that- And his pause only fanned the flames.

Freemind gasped out as he clenched the bed sheets with his free hand, his voice overflowing with unrestricted desperation when his pleasure was hauled. “GOD Barney please don’t stop!! You make me feel so fucking good- I’ll be good! I promise I’ll be so good for you!!! I’ll do anything you want! Please please PLEASE...!!!” He begged shamelessly, crying out noises of agonized frustration that made goosebumps cover Calhoun’s entire body.

Barney had to sit up and get a better view of Freemind because he was shaking with excitement now, leaning over him he was able to better move his arm and peek at his face- Gordon’s expression didn’t disappoint. Completely flushed, his tongue sticking out and his eyes lost and soft with creased brows.

Calhoun pumped their hands quickly, not waiting a second longer- He wanted him to feel so so good! Extra good for letting him hear such amazing sounds!

“Auuu-ugghggg- _Baaaaaaarney~!_ ” Freemind moaned, cumming almost immediately after his friction was returned. All that was left of him were his heavy breaths as he closed his eyes immensely pleased.

“Very good...Gordon you did so good, you’re amazing...” Calhoun finally spoke again once Freemind went quiet. Leaning over to kiss his sweaty head and clean up since Gordon was making no effort to move. Pretty sure he was passed out already.

Barney briefly got up to throw out a ton of tissues and wash his hands before climbing back into bed, instantly lubing a palm up again and attaching it to his own hard-on so he could take care of himself. He bit his lip as he rubbed one out furiously, looking over at his sleeping companion. “Fucking christ, I’m going to be thinking about the way you said my name _forever._ ”

* * *

It’s the beginning of the next day, a work day.

Calhoun is going about his business when a random scientist comes up to him.

“Hey uh, do you have any idea what happened to Dr. Freeman?” They ask, being nosy. “You seem to be friends with the guy and... He’s just really off today. Is he okay?”

Barney raised his brows, “Uh- No I had no idea. I’ll check on him...”

When he finds him, Gordon is quietly looking through papers. Slowly flipping the same one over and over again.

“Everything alright?” The guard asks in his soft voice.

He glanced over. “Yeah I guess... Just really hungover... sucks...” Freemind assured but he wore such a miserable expression. He looked and sounded genuinely depressed.

Barney creased his brows sadly. He’s never seen him like this before and he’s definitely been hungover in the past. He wonders if he was still bummed out over the whole blowjob situation or if he remembered how loud he got last night and got embarrassed. It was a 50/50 guess between the two.

Calhoun goes to touch his back comfortingly- but then remembers where they are and puts his arm back down, “Okay bud... If ya need a ride home or anything, let me know.”

Gordon seems to notice Barney cancelled his hand movement and frowns more. “Yeah.” He tries to go back to what he was doing as his friend walks away, but now he had a couple of thoughts swirling around his head...

He’s quick to find Calhoun a couple of hours later.

“Hey, come help me in storage?” Freemind asks, his voice still flat with a dull sadness.

“Oh uh, sure doc.” Barney snaps to attention and gets someone to cover his position while he takes a trip with Freemind. They walked down the hall and along some stairs in silence, until they were stepping into the dimly lit storage closet that was lined with shelves and boxes stacked to the ceiling. Anybody would need help getting something that was tucked away in this mess. He heard the door shut.

“So what is it-?” Calhoun turned to his co-worker who had been following behind him, but was surprised when Gordon wraps his arms around him in a hug.

“I need this right now...” Freemind admitted in his somber tone. Head hung next to his.

A small smile appeared on the guard’s face and he held him back, “Course bud.” Aw to think a moment with him was enough to brighten Freemind’s bad day... It made him happy knowing he brought him joy.

One thing seemed to lead to another as they ended up exchanging some kisses in the privacy of the closet, Gordon greedily taking his affection as a much needed mood boost with a humming sigh. His hand caressing his jaw in a wanting manner.

This was nice. That is, until Barney sternly pushed him away by the shoulders making Freemind snap his eyes open. He noticed there was a beam of light making their shadows fall on the floor in front of him. Then his blood ran cold as he heard the door slowly squeak close, taking the bright hallway light with it.

He looked over at Calhoun’s equally mortified face. “What. The fuck. Was that?” Freemind questioned on the verge of snapping, his back having been facing the door.

Barney opened his mouth but nothing came out at first, “I’ll be right back, okay?? You stay here.” He rushed off, throwing the door open and running down the hall.

To his relief, the light was on in Dr. Kleiner’s office and he knocked letting himself in. “Doc-!” He pleaded quickly shutting the door behind him, “Please don’t-”

Kleiner cut him off, raising his hands. “Calm down, Barney!! I won’t tell a soul.” He zipped his lip with a sincere smile, knowing that fooling around on the clock was grounds for immediate termination. “I know there are a lot of new beautiful women hires around the facility now, but do be more careful next time. You might not be as lucky.”

Calhoun dropped his shoulders being reassured this would stay between them, thank god... but then he raised his brows. Woman- Oh, he guess Freeman could be mistaken for a woman from a quick glance of the back of his head with that ponytail. Heh... “Thank you, Dr. Kleiner. It means a lot.”

Barney went to go relay the message to Gordon, finding him sitting between the shelves with his head in his hands. But the news that everything would be okay seem to fall on deaf ears...

* * *

Freemind didn't show up to work the next day.

This was extremely unlike him. He always demanded to work even when he was sick as a dog. Something about having a shitty time at home when he caught a cold, so it didn’t matter if he had a shitty time at work.

Barney started to become worried when he couldn’t find him anywhere, had he really not shown up today...? He takes the time to go to the locker room during his break and dials Freemind’s flip phone. 

It rings for a bit before he gets an answer, “What?”

“Hey it’s Barney.” He squints as it sounds noisy on the other end, “Where are you?”

“I’m..” Freemind laughs at something, his speech slurred. “I’m at Scott's”

“Why??” At 1pm on a weekday?? He wanted to question him more but wasn’t going to risk saying something out loud that’d get his co-worker in trouble if overheard.

“Because I’m...fucking wasted.” He manages to say before the phone call devolves into background clutter on Freemind’s end.

“Hello??” Calhoun sighs... He didn't have time to change out of uniform, but if he drove over there during his lunch break no one will know he was gone.

He travels into town and parks himself in front of the bar. The last name “Scott” glowing in shiny letters above it. He steps in with an irritated groan, already hearing Gordon’s voice above the rest of the small afternoon crowd.

“Gordon.” He said firmly.

Freemind turns his head, a big smile rising onto his cheeks. “Heeey, you’re playing hooky too?? Get Barney a couple of drinks on meee.” He commands the bartender as he slides off the stool and onto his feet.

“No more drinks.” The guard says unamused. “I’m taking you home.”

“Hahah why? You just got here!” Freemind urged as he touched his protective vest too much, grabbing the top of it and pulling.

Calhoun frowned sternly. “No. You’re going home.”

“No no no~” Gordon laughs as Barney tries to corral him.

Another bar guest is waiting to walk past them and makes an obvious disgruntled noise, "Listen to your boyfriend and go home already." They comment.

Freemind’s expression changes on a dime. He grabs Barney's gun out of the holster and spins around to smack the stranger in the head with it, missing by only a hair. “WHAT DID YOU SAY TO ME!? WHAT DID YOU FUCKING CALL ME!?!”

Calhoun immediately twists Gordon’s wrist and forces it behind his back, taking his gun, shoving it away and hooking an arm around him. "Whoa WHOA! I got this guys! I-I’m an officer, don’t get involved!!!" This fucking idiot was gonna start a bar fight!

He quickly dragged Freemind off his feet and jammed the both of them into the single person bathroom.

“Are you crazy!?” Barney pushed Gordon’s back against the wall, “Never touch my goddamn gun! Trying to get us all fucking killed- And why the _fuck_ are you drinking like a camel on a work day?? Have you been drinking since you woke up!? How are you completely shit-faced already!”

Freemind blinks at him slowly. But then smirked with a saucy look in his eyes. He leans an elbow on Calhoun’s shoulder, "I have no idea what you're saying but you're _so hot_ when you're angry~"

Barney grabbed him by the arm and shoved his face in the sink, "Wash up stupid, we're leaving."

As they were making their exit, Freemind started making things difficult again. Fed up, Calhoun threw Gordon over his shoulder and carried him all the way to his car. Enough was enough.

* * *

He tucks Gordon tight into bed. The sheets trap him there as Barney shoves the ends between the mattress and the frame, as well as some under the man himself.

“Now...” Calhoun stands next to him, watching as the drunk struggles a little but submits to his linen prison. "Are you coming to work tomorrow?"

Freemind frowns, "How am I supposed to show my face there again when everyone thinks I’m gay??"

“They don’t.” Barney sighs, “They'll only know if you decide to tell them. Trust me.”

That wasn’t what Gordon wanted to hear and he started to toss around again, “Everyone knows! Everyone knows! You're going to tell everyone and my life is going to be ruined...!” He insisted in a panic.

“No no- If it really means that much to ya, I promise I won’t say a thing!”

Freemind turns his head away, voice getting muggy with tears. “They all think I'm a cock chugging fiend... I only like you...” His voice trails off and he sniffles.

Barney creased his brows gently as he stared at him. Man... This bastard really did like him, didn’t he? Fine... He’ll humor him this once. "No bud, everyone at work thinks you slam pussy like a champ. A real bachelor."

"...Really?" He asks quietly.

"Yeah. You’re Gordon Freeman after all. We all know how manly you are." Technically, he wasn’t lying. This was the image Freemind always upheld and defended.

Freemind rests his head again and smiles as he takes comfort in those words, looking like he was finally ready to stop fighting his sleepiness. “Tired...”

“G'night, Gordon. I’ll see you tomorrow.”


	7. Boot Camp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There’s a beauty in two people having the capability to both fist fight another and love each other. Freemind is very pleased to help Calhoun challenge his limits this time and express his concealed frustration.

Barney is in a shit mood, he hates that they had to do regulated training.

Like, it’s understandable that they couldn’t have soft donut-eating guards on a large scale government project. But fuck he couldn’t stand it. He just wanted to do his job and drink a beer afterwards.

He sighed, stretching his arms out trying to get ready. There was a whole military style outdoor gym in front of him. When the superior said ‘go’ all the employees here would have to complete it to keep their jobs. He wasn’t looking forward to it-

“Hey buddy.” A familiar voice suddenly said next to him.

Calhoun turned around to see Freemind. “What are you doing here?”

“They’re rolling out these new things called H.E.V. suits, and I’mmm going to get one~” He bragged. “I guess they need to test me to make sure I’m rad enough. I know I am so, no skin off my bones.”

“Uh-huh...” Barney hummed out, not sure what else to say. “Well, glad to hear it.”

Freemind creased his brows, not satisfied with that reaction. He clears his throat loudly, “Yeah it’s going to be a big deal. These suits are the wave of the future, not only enhancing the user’s physical abilities and protection but they can even like- administer morphine and shit!” He smiles wide again as if knowing what he was saying was worthy of excitement and jealousy. “And I’M going to be one of the few special people trained to use it. You think they would let one of these old douche scientists handle the important equipment? They need strong strapping geniuses like me~”

Barney wasn’t really listening after he started getting all science talk on him, he finished doing his stretches and kind of shrugged Freemind off. “Whatever you say.” He answered flatly more concerned about the task at hand.

Gordon stared at the back of Barney’s head as he turned towards the starting line. He clenched his teeth as he held back a scowl. He hits him with news like this -literally the scientific development of the century- and he’s not even remotely impressed??? He wanted Barney’s attention, this bastard!

Tsh... He’ll show him. He’ll whip his ass so bad in this obstacle course that he’ll be shaking in his low grade bullet-proof vest and stupid chunky helmet. Or- his sweatpants and Black mesa issued graphic tee since that’s what he was wearing right now. Did make his butt look kinda nice- WAIT NO HE WAS ANGRY WITH HIM.

No Calhoun ass admiring!!! He would be admiring HIS ASS when he leaves Barney in the dust!

Yeah that’s right...

Freemind stepped up next to him without so much as another glance at Calhoun, he kicked his sneakers against the dirt and rotated his ankles before crouching in a starting position. Ready to take off.

Win Win WIN. HE WAS A WINNER. IF HE WON AT TRIVIAL THINGS IT’D MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER!!!

On your mark, get set- Freemind sprinted off to the head of the pack as soon as he heard the go. Barney jogged leisurely behind, all he could do was pace himself.

* * *

Calhoun was hurting so bad, he stopped on the field after the finish line and bent over in pain. Out of breath, sweating and strained. His limbs felt like they were being stabbed, his back absolutely killing him, a cramping in his gut- Uggggh this was hell!

He had to suck it up. He knew he _had_ to do it to keep his job, he made it through and showed them he was capable as always.

But Freemind was about to push his patience too far.

Gordon was watching. He felt an immense satisfaction knowing he accomplished what he set out to do. He must of finished 20 minutes ahead of his dear ol fuck buddy. For a moment, his ego bloated his head and he gave into the impulse to let Barney know.

He walked up next to the guard, slapping his hand down hard on Calhoun’s back in his crippled position. Freemind whispered in his ear, “Aww old man can’t take it anymore huh...? That’s too bad...”

Barney slowly turned his head to stare daggers. He was fucking with him? _Now?_

Gordon’s grin grew wider, “Looks like I’m going to have to find someone better and fit to the task of fucking me senseless. This is just pathetic.”

Calhoun’s face dropped, oh this was the game he was fucking going to play?? Not a good enough performance for you Gordon!? Huh?? HUH???

He Immediately turned and dug his hands as hard as he could into his torso, tackling Freemind to the ground. “FUCK YOU!!!” He geared up his arms to start plumbing the scientist, but Gordon caught his fists in both of his hands keeping him at bay. 

Freemind lit up with an overjoyed manic expression, absolutely _delighted_ that he garnered this reaction. “OHHH you gonna beat me up, big guy?? You better make it fucking good! I’m waiting! Come on, why haven't you hit me yet??” He heckled with a sharp grin and laughter.

Barney swung his arms away and managed to get a hold of Gordon this time, flipping him over amidst their scrapping and grabbing his hair so he could shove his head into the dirt. He rubbed his face into it causing him to struggle.

This was as far as he could get before six different pairs of hands were prying them apart. A group forcefully pulled Barney up to restrain him and another hauled Freemind to his feet where he coughed, having a dirt stain on half his face.

“CALHOUN! WHAT IN HELL’S NAME DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING!?” The guard’s superior stomped over, boiling when he saw one of his men step out of line.

“He’s- He...!” Barney tried explaining himself, shaking as he pointed a finger at Freemind accusingly.

“I don’t want to hear one more word out of you! Go run the obstacle course- NOW.” His higher-up demanded.

Barney’s heart dropped.

Again...? He had to run that nightmare again...?

This blows...

* * *

The last few remaining employees were getting into their cars by the time Calhoun was hobbling to the showers rooms. Everyone had already cleaned themselves up while he was slumping through the course again and getting an earful from his boss.

At least now he could spend as long as he wanted in the locker room without worrying about the staff telling him to hurry up.

Yet to his dismay, someone was waiting there for him.

Barney lowered his head, trying to not let his livid emotions rise up to his expression as he laid eyes on Freemind. Shoulders shrugged up tensely as he walked past him. “I fucking hate you sometimes...”

Gordon put a hand on his own hip and rolled his head to a side, “Here I thought you couldn’t run that course any _slower,_ you reeeeeally showed me.”

“This was all your fucking fault. Go to hell before I deck you upside the head.”

He wasn’t hearing a safeword...~

“Man you’re _extra_ pissed, you’re lucky you wear it so well or I’d really let you have it.” Freemind grinned.

“You’re askin’ to get _fucked up._ ” Barney snarled, his eyes widened and teeth visible like an animal when he turned to face him again, unable to ignore him anymore.

Gordon lowered his eyelids, wearing a smile so smug it would infuriate anyone. “I’d like to see you try.” That’s it Calhoun, let the anger flow through you. You deserve to release every piece of pent up rage tucked inside that you so patiently hold. This is the time, Gordon wanted him to let it out and feel that delicious adrenaline course through him.

Barney stomped close enough to latch his fingers onto Freemind’s shirt and pull him by it, “You ABSOULTE DICKHEAD, I can’t fucking stand you...!”

“Hah- That’s why you’re rock hard right now right?”

His raging boner was very obvious as his loose pants did nothing to restrict them. As hot and steaming as the fire burning at Barney's enraged center. And Freemind slapped his hand over his partner’s crotch and groped him roughly to make his point.

Calhoun pushed him away wanting to throw him across the room, but Gordon switched into attack mode given the opportunity. 

He charged towards him and grabbed as much of Barney’s shirt as he could in his two hands. Hauling the hefty man straight off his feet and slamming him against the wall.

Calhoun’s expression lights up with genuine fear for a second, having no idea Freemind could pull off what he just did. It made him gulp hard with excitement.

Freemind’s eyes nearly began to glow with power, “That’s fucking right. You don’t even have to say anything- it’s written all over your face. You didn’t think I was as strong as you. But I had to pass aaaaaall the same fitness exams you did to be hired. And I have to say, you reeeeally let yourself go. You wouldn’t last two seconds if a real disaster happened.” Gordon was breathing sloppily, his adrenaline was through the roof. “But that’s okay, because I’m kind enough to protect my weak little co-worker~”

Calhoun _really_ started to thrash around now. Their power struggle became more even as they fought back and forth for command. Eventually he pins Freemind over a counter, ass to his front again.

“I’m going to fuck you into the goddamn ground! I’ll show you who’s old and needs replacing.” Barney growled through tired breaths.

Freemind waited for him to do so, but after a long pause Calhoun leaned against him laying his face in his shoulder. Not moving anymore and letting out a pained groan.

“Uh... You good?” Gordon chirped up.

“No... My back...” Barney said miserably into his shirt, god his manual labor ridden body... his aching spine was hurting so fucking bad... 

Freemind cleared his throat, letting it be quiet for a minute. “...Alright you want to call a truce?”

“...Yeah.” Barney got up off him and took a seat on a locker room bench, resting. He needed some tender love and care...

* * *

Calhoun let hot steaming water wash over him. He sighed loudly as it made some of his pain melt away...

It wasn’t really that strange to find a couple of naked co-workers in the showers at Black Mesa, but they were in the same stall. And Freemind was working diligently to rub his soapy hands into his friend’s sore back in a massage.

Barney wore a little smile, this was nice... it almost made up for the fact that Gordon had been a complete shithead today. He would think of a way to get him back... but he’ll leave that for another day. He tried to find peace for right now.

“Hey, still got that boner?” Freemind asked, popping his head over Barney’s shoulder as he pressed his body against him.

“Uh- yeah kinda.”

“Let me help you with that.” He demanded as he started touching up his front.

Calhoun raised a brow. “Aren’t you eager.”

“Pft. Well.” Gordon’s voice became more seductive, “You did _so good today_ Barney, you’re the only motherfucker that ran that obstacle course _twice._ I’m really really impressed~”

“Oooh...Mn-” He felt the pulse return to his groin as he heard the praise and fingers trail up and down his torso.

“Can I give you something special? A prize for doing so good?” Freemind asked as he wrapped his fingers around the other man’s dick.

Barney grabbed the top of the stall’s wall with a hand, scared of the wet tiles beneath them. But oh fuck this was just what he needed right now... “Well... Okay- Please just don’t let us slip and die.”

“I won’t.”

Calhoun let himself relax, trusting him. He leaned his head back onto Freemind’s shoulder and put his weight on him as he savored his cock being stroked. “Ooooh Gordoooon...” He was sooooo _relieved._ This felt amazing after literal hours of exasperation.

Freemind adjusted his footing to compensate for the extra weight in this slippery environment. His face right next to his ear, speaking just loud enough to be heard over the running water. “You’re the ballsiest man in this whole goddamn faculty... To think you actually have the nerve to shove _my_ face in the ground? Knowing fully well everyone is watching? Knowing we’re in the middle of _work._ That’s the hottest fucking thing I’ve ever seen~”

“I couldn’t hold back anymore...” He replied in a daze. It felt so good in the moment, to just make Freemind shut that arrogant little mouth of his. To let out his frustration with this entire day.

Gordon smirked as he pressed his fingers hard into the other man’s shaft. Making sure he felt every stroke as vividly and strongly as the last. He wanted the pleasure to overwhelm him. To sink right through his skin and straight to his core. “You’re so sexy when you let that beast out, nothing less from the man worthy of my touch. I’ll reward you with every little inch of pleasure you could ever want...”

“Uggghghhh...~” Barney bit his lip, fuck he could hear that echo though out the entire locker room. Reverberated off all the smooth tiled walls and floors. But with the way Freemind was pumping he couldn’t help it. Everything- everything about this felt so glorious.

“That’s it, you sound so good when you moan for me. You deserve it, you deserve to be pleased like a _king._ You worked so _hard_ today, I was delighted watching every. Single. Second of it. You’re so _worthy_ of receiving the divine right of pleasure I’m giving you...”

When he had his hand at the base of his dick he gripped harder and really made sure his pressure tickled Calhoun just right. Pacing each stroke to milk the maxim feeling out of him, a thumb stopping at the top and rubbing roughly over it. 

“Ohh I can feel how much you want it, you want to be pleased so bad. You want the reward with every last drop of your energy.” Freemind cooed as he let the pace pick up faster and faster when his hand moved again.

Barney was practically shaking. Holy fuck he felt like he was going to collapse, he didn’t even know fully what Gordon was saying- But it felt so good. Oh lord did it feel good and sound good and smell good being all soaped up and the hot water keeping him warm and easing his muscle pain. He did so good today, he did it, he deserved to feel gooood-

“I want you to feel better than anybody else. You’re going to feel the best orgasm of your life because I’m going to _give it to you._ You’re _mine,_ Barney. I will give you nothing less than _ecstasy._ ”

Calhoun was falling deeper and deeper into the words being spun into his head. The more Freemind said it and the more he let go, he began to believe it. Yes it felt so good... better than good... It felt amazing. Gordon would make him feel amazing...

“When you come Barney, it’s going to be so rewarding. I will give you the best feeling, any second now, when you feel _especially_ happy. I know you’ll feel _so good._ I’ll let you cum so hard.”

Barney raised his hips restlessly tensing up, oh Gordon he wanted it, he wanted it more then anything else right now, his touch felt like heaven, he wanted it, he wanted it, he was so fucking close- _“Please give it to me!”_ He cried out desperately as he arched his back, breathing hard and noisily. Every exhale turning into a shameless groan.

Freemind almost choked hearing Barney _beg_ so loudly.. _._ Wow...~

Gordon had to swallow a mouth full of spit, being the excessively horny drooling God he was, so he could continue whispering his enhancing commands. “O-oh only for you Barney. I’ll give it to you. Because you’re such a good boy.” He cranked his wrist and jerked him fast. “Come for me, come for me right now and it’ll feel _ecstatic. Do it now. Barney_.”

“Hkn-!” Like a plug being pulled, he burst into his orgasm almost on command. It hit him in a way that was so intense and tingling that he was seeing stars.

Freemind hugged him around the waist when his footing staggered. No no no- hah he wasn’t letting any accidents happen on his watch! Seeing his partner like this was all it took to find the strength to support him while he had his moment... The moment he gave him~

Calhoun let go of the wall he was holding onto for dear life once he was confident in standing on his own two feet again. Christ he felt so lost in the feeling for those few seconds... That lush lush pleasure that was ushered on with his whole body. What a reward indeed.

Soon the water was turned off and they toweled themselves dry.

Barney sat on the bench, half dressed and slowly trying to find the energy to finish pulling his clothes on. “Can we just... take a nap in the car?” He smiled at Gordon exhausted.

“Alright.”

* * *

Freemind yawned, rubbing an eye. He was reclined slightly in the passenger’s seat of Barney’s car, Calhoun doing the same thing in the driver's seat but still fast asleep.

Looks like they had napped straight through to the evening, the parking lot dark with no lights besides a few from the staff building and the road in the distance. Huh, he didn’t mean to doze off. Guess today’s exercise took more out of him than he thought.

He made himself comfortable seeing as they weren’t going anywhere soon. Out stretching his arms and arching his back, having been laying the same way for a while. He had caught a ride here and would now need one back home. He gave a causal sniffle as he settled in again. Oh- he was rocking a hard on.

He never did finish himself in the locker rooms and had some pleasant dreams. Ah, the way Barney had lost it in the shower came back to him accompanied by tingles. He couldn’t help egging him on... He craved Calhoun’s attention whether it was good or bad. He just wanted him to acknowledge him all the time. It made him feel good.

Freemind glanced at Barney’s still figure, only a shadow in the sunless lighting. It couldn’t hurt to maybe. Take care of himself here. While he was still asleep. He’d never know it happened.

He started to feel extra cozy in his seat and the warmth of the car. Yeah... Couldn’t hurt. He slid his fingers down his shirt, extra aware of each crinkling noise that came from it. Quiet... It was very quiet out here in the middle of evening after everyone had gone home. A fairly large sized plot of nature surrounding them since this was a training site.

His thoughts drifted off as he slipped his fingers under his waistband and pulled his meat out with the slightest rustle. Per his usual, Freemind had his fingers in his mouth like the slobbering little slut he was before swallowing the rest of his excessive spit. That’d be fine for softly stroking himself.

He wasn’t going to tug with a full blown animalistic arm movement, instead he was letting his fingers do the work. Stroking the longer digits along his shaft sternly as his thumb and index finger focused solely on his tip. He closed his eyes with a gentle sigh. A causal rub down if you will. If he let his fantasies envelope him and relaxed enough, he could easily have a discreet orgasm.

Especially when he thought about Barney... He had sounded so good today. Whether it was his harsh threats to put him in his place or the absolutely delighted moans he filled the foggy shower air with.

It made him so excited when they put their hands on each other. Calhoun was so _rough_ with him today and- he kind of liked having the slightly thicker man throwing him around. Pinning him painfully against the counter with his full body weight so he was forced to behave for him. He liked the fight- it made his adrenaline sky rocket. And it made payback all the sweeter when he dominated him the next time.

Gordon’s hand got slightly busier, eyes drifting shut.

It was like a game between them. The winner got their pride boosted, having the other submit to their dominating figure and firm words. And the loser got pleased senselessly, allowed to slip off and enjoy being taken care of in exchange for relinquishing command. And just... Barney was great at doing both. Picturing him in the act made pulses raise up in him again.

Freemind squirmed momentarily, “Mph-” He bit back a groan, teeth sunk into his bottom lip. Oh Barney, he made him so hot and bothered. And he was right there next to him. He could feel his face getting heated as little pings of pleasure tickled him. Huuuhhhh, maybe he would yank himself hard just to finish- yeah yeah he could only squeeze himself so hard without the urge to start pumping arise, it’s fine it’s fine-

But before he could get crazy, he heard loud shifting and he shot his eyes open. Calhoun was sitting up on a knee and cranked over the gear stick, hand jammed down next to Freemind’s seat.

“W-what the fuck, I thought your back hurt-” Gordon stammered being caught by surprise and presses his hand down on his dripping cock. He cuts himself off with a gasp when the back of his seat suddenly drops all the way down as his co-worker pulls the lever underneath him.

“Shut up.” Calhoun replied firmly and swatted his hand away so his dick popped up again. Without further elaboration he grabbed the boner by the base and leaned over far enough to lap his tongue over him messily, his mouth open to suck the tip in and Barney gave a small shameless moan around it as if he thought it tasted delicious.

“O-oh _shit._ ” Freemind groaned out breathlessly, his clean hand sinking into Barney’s hair and tangling his fingers with the strands. Wow his mouth felt _amazing._ So much warmer and wetter than his slightly damp palm. And the way his tongue was swirling around under the curve of his bell and dipping in hard against the slit on the end-

“Uuuunhhh- That hits the f-fucking spot...~” Gordon admitted, his hips giving the slightest thrusts as he was in great need of friction.

Calhoun was quick to pick up where Gordon left off. His hand rubbed the lower end of shaft as he went to town sucking on the top.

Freemind had no plans of holding back as he melted into his heat. Getting too handsy when he came, he grabbed his hair harder and pushed Calhoun’s head down. Which forced the guard to make a noise in distress and he shot back up.

“Guh- You fuck...!” Barney complained in an unclear voice, rolling down the window and splitting out a mouth full of cum in one noisy loogie. He punched him in the arm making Freemind flinch, “You tried to choke me you son of a bitch!”

Gordon couldn’t hold back a floaty chuckle as he rubbed his now sore shoulder, “Hey, better then getting it all over your car right?”

Barney rolled his eyes and smirked. He fixed his seat and turned the car on, the headlights giving some much needed illumination. “Put yer cock away. Let’s get a bite to eat.”

That was enough fun for one day.


	8. New Year

Somewhere in New Mexico, everyone from Black Mesa was off from work today.

It’s the biggest celebration of the millennium. December 31st, 1999. The end of the world.

And everyone was partying their asses off.

Barney could be found laughing amidst a small crowd in the kitchen of a house party. He has a beer in hand, he’s chatting among friends and enjoying the music playing. He even had a pointed party hat on with the new year stretching across it.

This year had so many new twists and turns he never would have expected, his life seemed stagnant for so long. The same friends, same job, same co-workers. And then Freemind made his move. A relationship with someone he’s seen everyday for years? And it only bloomed into something now? It made a big smile appear on his face just thinking about it.

Freemind emerges from the living room, trying to make his way through the doorway between all the people. Trying not to make a face as he was forced to brush past other guests. But his expression eased the moment he spotted Calhoun.

“I've been looking for you.” He grinned grabbing his free hand as Barney finished his drink. It was rare to see the two be even vaguely affectionate in public and it seemed to slip both their slightly tipsy minds. “I wanna show you something.”

Calhoun raised his brows pleased when he noticed him join them, placing the empty bottle on the counter. “Course.”

A distant voice called out as the music lowered, “Almost time everybody!”

As everyone gathered around the television, the channel tuned to the New Year’s ball drop, Gordon led Barney outside to the yard.

“You enjoying the party?” Barney asked as his eyes softened, looking at him endearingly as he squeezed his hand back. It meant a lot that he wanted to spend the holiday with him. It made his heart flutter.

Freemind was too excited to listen, he closed the door all but a crack. They could hear everyone counting down as he turned to Barney with wide eyes.

"I've _always_ wanted to do this!" Gordon announced with a smirk and tinted cheeks, thinking of the tradition that only couples got to do tonight. His free hand cupped the side of Calhoun’s face and he pulled him into a kiss, an array of noise exploded from within the house at the same moment as the clock struck midnight.

Barney eagerly locked lips with him, hand sneaking around his waist and keeping Freemind close. Fuck a brief kiss, he practically dipped him making Gordon throw an arm up around his shoulders.

They were startled apart as a neighboring firework boomed overhead.

“Heh...” Barney grinned as he bumped foreheads with Freemind. Feeling his cheeks were warm and an equally happy gaze in his co-worker's eyes.

“I can’t think of a better way to start the year.”


	9. Play Doctor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isn’t it obvious? Freemind wants to service Barney so bad for being the only motherfucker that puts up with his bullshit. Now open your assigned reading.  
>   
> “This book outlines the basic principles and application of thrust techniques.”

Another day, another weekend being spent in the Freemind man cave.

Calhoun was sitting with him until his flip phone rang. “Oh I have to take this.” Recognizing the number he got up and wandered away from the sofa to answer it.

Of course, this piqued Gordon’s interest. Who was he expecting a call from?? He rarely saw Barney get calls, he was under the assumption that he was a loser with no friends. Then again, he had only gotten a mobile phone a little while ago. Was it a girl? Was a woman calling him!? Hah- no no paranoia calm down. He was simply too epic for Barney to be enticed by some random women. Surely there was a reasonable explanation.

“Had to take that.” Barney said as he sat back down.

“Who was that?” Gordon blurted out, he couldn’t help himself.

“Chiropractor appointment. Back’s been awful so I figured it was about time I made one.”

Freemind squinted and suddenly went quiet. His mouth pressed tightly closed as he just made a noise in return. He tried to look back at the television and drop it.

Barney rolls his eyes, he could see Gordon was burning to comment. “What, what’s with the face.”

“That’s such a scam, a chiropractor is nothing more than a fancy masseur.” He immediately answered as if a dam had been opened. “Honestly, do you know how much bullshit that is?? A complete rip off, utter waste of money. They tell you it’s a medical practice but in reality so many of those offices aren’t even run by a professional, it’s information any jackass could look up and perform. I COULD DO THAT.”

Calhoun let out a laugh, which only made Freemind angrier, “Uh yeah people pay because I can’t twist my own spine into a pretzel, asshole. And last time I checked, you're not that kind of doctor. So surprise surprise, I’m paying for a service.”

Freemind’s face was slightly heated with an upset blush, then he grinned wide.

“HAH, that’s where you’re wrong shithead!” Gordon hustled his way off the sofa and crouched next to his bookcase, vigorously scanning the shelves before he pulled one out. He held the book up towards his co-worker as he walked over. “Like I said verbatim, anyone can buy this. ‘Chiropractic Technique and Manual Therapy.’ Easy as reading homework for class.” He smacks the hardcover very pleased with himself.

Barney stared, his face twisted in confusion. “Why do you have that...?”

“Uh.” Gordon cleared his throat and shrugged, “General research.” Totally not because he saw how inefficient he was when trying to massage Barney after the obstacle course and wanted to be better for his sake. Haha not that at all.

“Point is, I can do whatever that con-artist is going to do for free. And just as good if not _better!_ ”

“You’re actually crazy.” Barney said with a shake of his head.

“I’m being serious!” The theoretical physicist barked. “It’s all outlined here, I’ve read this thing cover to fucking cover!! I bet the guy you set up that appointment with doesn't even have a _degree._ I’m an actual doctor!”

“Jesus Christ...” Barney held his face in his own hand, yet a smile spread across his face. He was so adamant about proving himself... It was so cute and ridiculous. Lord help him, why was Gordon like this? “Alright alright, whatever will shut you up!” He tried to sound firm but it came out as a chuckle.

Freemind raised his brows being given the go-ahead. “...Go sit on the bed, I need to get some things.” He ran away to a different part of his home with the book.

Calhoun could only sigh, what did this man have in store for him?

* * *

When Freemind appeared in the bedroom, he was dressed as if he was about to go to work. His lab coat on, hair pulled back and snapping a pair of gloves over his fingers as he walked towards him.

Barney sat with his hands resting on his knees, watching as he brought a bag in with him and everything.

Freemind adjusted his glasses. “Hello, I’ll be working with you today.” He said in a confident tone, developing into a character. “So, you’re here for some spinal manipulation?”

“Do _not_ manipulate my spine, Gordon.”

“That’s Dr. Freeman to you.” Freemind grinned smugly.

“Pft...” Calhoun couldn’t believe he was playing along with this. Most wouldn’t guess it at first, but Freemind had a silly side. When he wasn’t irritated or analysing things, he was cracking jokes or even did these playful self indulgent bits like pretending to be a monkey. Stuff like that never failed to get a grin out of him.

Anyway, he found himself interested in seeing where this roleplay went. “Yeah I’d like some uh, pain and tension relieving therapy. No bone realigning, Doc.”

“Well, you’re in the right place~” Freemind leaned down, pinching his patient’s cheek too hard and only smiling wider as he squirmed. “Lay prone.” He directed with his hand making a turning movement. “Oh- and take off your shirt.”

Calhoun raised his brow as he followed the instructions. “Almost certain people usually keep their shirt on at the chiropractor.”

“Whoooooo’s the doctor here??”

Barney couldn’t roll his eyes harder if he tried. He just made himself comfortable with a pillow underneath his head as he laid down on his stomach. He could hear Gordon ruffling through his bag, bottles clinking gently against each other every so often.

“Now, we’re going to start with the upper back.” Gordon poked his index finger rather forcefully along and between his shoulder blades, the latex giving Barney an odd feeling as the doctor dragged it across his skin. “Tell me where it hurts.”

Calhoun rolled his shoulders, hearing a crack from within himself. “Uh... Yeah there is pretty sore.”

“Right there. Yes, that's a typical spot for strain. I know exactly what’ll release that tension.” One hand stayed on his back and the other went to the supplies he had set up next to him. Gordon went as far as to state the name of the technique he was planning to use and the procedure, he was committed to the role alright. Even down to the distant clinical tone of his voice.

Barney rested his head to the side so he could glance at what his homemade chiropractor was doing. Mmm... His eyes softened as he tried to look at his face from over his shoulder. He hadn’t really noticed it until he started seeing Gordon on his down time, but his business and casual appearances both gave off a different type of sexy.

Being a security guard with shorter hair and a bulky uniform meant for protection, his morning routine didn’t change all that much from day to day. It didn’t make sense to get all dolled up when he needed to be ready to run around and get sweaty at work. Freemind on the other hand was no stranger to putting a lot of care into his appearance specifically for work, it was always clear he not only cleaned up well but took pride in looking polished.

Now was no expectation. He had his spiky hair slicked back and in that low ponytail, his lab coat pressed previously for wrinkles and the button-up shirt looking just as sharp. Though he wouldn’t be able to see it now, Calhoun knew his work slacks showed off Gordon’s ass _prominently_. So much so that Barney has asked him if he tailored his pants to be purposely tight there.

Either way, the man had cake. That much was undeniable. His thoughts started to drift off, orbiting around these cheeky memories. Times when he had watched Gordon walk away or turn around or bend over in these dastardly pants. How he had to rip his eyes away the moment he realized he was staring on the job, he would force himself to take a deep breath and fight to keep a straight face hoping no one noticed. He couldn’t let himself revel in the impulsive thoughts to slap and grab a handful of ass every time the scientist unknowingly presented it to him. Fuck, the more he thought about it a blush rised up to his face.

“Oho-” He let out a noise being snapped out of it, a pair of gloved hands rubbing down hard on his shoulders with what felt like a lotion or oil.

“Just as I thought, you’re as tense as they come. I’ll straighten you out.” Freemind stated as he pushed his palm down moving along his spine.

Barney failed in keeping back a short chuckle between some quiet noises.

Freemind raised his brow, “What's so funny?”

“Well uh...” The patient answered, “It's just if anyone was to ‘straighten’ me, you really put out the heterosexual image.” He tried to explain with an amused grin. “But to be honest, when I'm around you I start to feel the opposite way.”

“...” Freemind cleared his throat, lifting his hands so he could gently put his fingers either side of Barney’s neck and make his head look away from him. “Stop trying to distract me. Very inappropriate thing to say to your chiropractor.”

That made Calhoun's smile grow wider, “Oh, pardon me doc. I'll try to be more serious.” He wondered if Freemind liked hearing that. That he made Barney feel all gay and fluffy inside. He wasn’t letting it show if so, but he didn’t sound offended either. He took that as a sign that he was doing a good job playing along.

Gordon went quiet again, his focus moving to other parts of his body. It did feel nice, whatever he was doing. His hands pressed in a very specific way as they trailed down, if Barney didn’t know better he'd think he really was a medical specialist. 

“Alright I’m going to need you to lay on your side facing me.” He instructed.

“Oh-” He was starting to fall asleep Freemind was being so thorough, blinking his eyes open the guard lifted himself and did as he said, putting the arm he was leaning on under his pillow.

The doctor was quick to put one hand cradling Barney’s ass and the other on his shoulder, he leaned down as his voice suddenly got more sultry. “Now, this shouldn’t hurt...” He warned before slowly pushing his shoulder down and keeping his butt straight.

Calhoun made a noise being twisted to stretch. By all means it was a helpful technique, but he found himself distracted the way Gordon was palming his backside and his face now hovering over his. “How’s that feel?” He asked, face leaned practically into his neck.

The patient found himself flustered with the sudden intimacy, “F-fine...”

“Good~” The way he cooed sent a small shiver through him. Then- Gordon withdrew again, clinical and distant as he guided Barney to do more stretches and rubbed him in ways that were less than professional. But he couldn’t exactly be sure... After all, he’d never been to a masseuse and hadn’t read anything on it like Gordon claims to have. But he couldn’t imagine full on ass grabs and whispering in his ear was standard.

Calhoun started to bubble with anticipation when the doctor kept teasing him, every now and again getting too close for comfort and then acting as if nothing strange happened. He couldn’t tell if he was leading up to more or just fucking with him, but he was starting to get riled up.

“See? Wouldn’t you say I’m a very good doctor?” Freemind said, being next to his ear again. His tone perked with intent and a hand ran down his patient’s bare chest. “I would have been the best.”

Barney was snapped out of his thoughts, so much was happening at once. He gulped, trying to find an opinion. “Actually yeah, my back does feel a bit better.” He huffed, a little tense in other places now though.

As if Gordon read his mind, his hand traveled further rubbing along his thigh. “I knew it would.” But he kept going, his palm acting as if that was the only logical way to get to his knee so he could casually push it back. Calhoun groaned every time his flexibility was tested. He glanced up to catch a devious grin.

“Tsh, you’re still holding way too much tension for my liking...” Freemind said almost scolding. “Lay supine.” he commanded and watched as Barney laid on his back. “Take deep calming breaths.”

Alright, easy enough. He wasn’t expecting some meditative relaxation from the Freeman, since he was the most unrelaxed person he knew. But he welcomed it, feeling too heated for no good reason. He arched his back slightly as he took a big audible inhale.

Freemind clapped a hand over Barney’s crotch almost immediately, making him anything but calm.

“Hey-!” Calhoun protested being startled.

“Ah ah just as I thought!” Gordon cut him off, bringing a finger to his face to shush him. “I can’t measure what you need to get better if you don’t cooperate, jeez I’ve never had such a mouthy patient.” Freemind smirked.

Calhoun’s cheeks got warmer, he was getting antsy being yanked around like this. “I can’t relax with your surprise groping, _doc._ ” The last word sounded especially frustrated. 

“This is all basic procedure, you want the best possible visit don't you?” Gordon argued, “You wouldn't cry getting your prostate checked so I don't see what the big deal is.”

Barney snorted, he was _such_ a wise ass. Honestly, if he hadn't agreed to let him take the lead on this one, he probably would have turned the tables on him by now. It didn’t help that his thoughts kept wandering, he sighed and laid his head down again. This better have a happy ending.

“That's it. Now close your eyes and count back from twenty. Keep them closed...”

Calhoun followed suit, hands resting crossed on his stomach as he pulled his thoughts up from his dick and attempted to ease up.

20... 19... 18... 

He could hear the ruffle of fabric but decided to go back to counting.

12... 11... 10...

The bed dipped for a moment beside him, that's nothing he's sure. But he couldn’t ignore the weight of another man suddenly sitting on his lap and he blinked his eyes open- oh and Freemind appeared to have lost his pants. His shame covered by his button down shirt and lab coat draped over his bare thighs.

“Tsk tsk... Really unacceptable, a doctor could make some major mistakes with your listening skills.” Gordon put a hand down and rubbed his patient thoroughly over his chest, causing him tingles. “I'm just trying to do my job here.”

Barney found himself smirking back at him. The harder he committed to the doctor act, the more ridiculous he started to sound, and that sort of thing delighted the guard in all it's silliness. It was hard to be in a bad mood when the sexy doctor kept lovingly running his hands over him and warming some of his aches and pains away.

“I’m trying my best, doc. I’ve never had this procedure done before.” Calhoun mused, giving in and playing along.

“Uh huh, and I’ve done this tons of times. I have soo much experience I could perform brain surgery with my eyes closed! So it’s clear who should be listening to who now, huh?” Freemind’s grin grew wider and cheeks tinted. “Plus all your complaining is only making my examination take _longer._ ”

He slaps his hand back on his crotch and squeezed him to prove his point. Fumbling with his hard on over his pants so incessantly it was as if he never seen a cock before. His fingers jammed around his shape, really inspecting him.

Barney groaned lowly, “You’re such a tease...” He mumbled. Alright, he would be lying if he said he wasn’t thoroughly in need of attention now.

Gordon locked his eyes on him, licking his lip as he tried to contain his own hunger. “Oh this is serious, I can’t fix this with all this crap in the way.” He confirmed, a little breathless and started tugging down Calhoun’s pants. “I’m going to have to remove your clothing from the affected area, don’t be alarmed sir.”

With that he released the patient’s dick to the cool air and Barney made a strained noise. The lotion slick glove wrapped around his rod and started stroking it. “It’s worse than I thought! Look at you. This has all the signs of muscle strain: tenderness, redness, spasms, swelling... hot to the touch.” He yanked a tedious, milking fist up his cock. Barney dug his fingers into the sheets and gave a short cry at the roughness.

“Just... Just get to it already.” He begged, words slightly slurred at the intensity of that one grip. He raised his hips in need, every time Freemind just started to make him feel good he withdrew away! It was driving him mad! How long had they even been at this? It felt like forever! Truly, just as excruciatingly slow and bothersome as a real doctor’s appointment.

“Nurse, it seems the patient is responsive to the treatment but it isn’t enough. He’s less coherent than before. I’ll have to switch to a stronger method.” Dr. Freeman said to an imaginary assistant. “Quickly, prepare him. His situation is becoming critical.” He said as he jammed a hand in his coat pocket and pulled out another rubber piece of protection. He ripped open the wrapper with his teeth.

“Yes, very sterile...” He hummed to himself as he happily dressed his dick with the condom. Gordon sat up on his knees, hovering just above Calhoun. “Are you nervous? Should I knock you out so you can sleep through the procedure?” He smirked.

“I can handle it, Doc.” Barney firmly replied as he put his hands on Gordon’s thighs, clenching his fingertips into his plump skin instead.

“Then you better not interfere.” He sang with confidence as he lined him up, pressing his tip to his entrance. He bit his lip as he worked his way down, this was going to be different than Barney pinning him down and ramming into him haphazardly. It quickly dawned on him that this would require finesse and a new movement he wasn’t quite used to. “A-and if I hear one word out of your mouth about how to do my job, your next visit will be to the morgue...!” He fumed.

Barney laughed quiet and softly, hands rubbing little circles into Freemind’s thighs. “You got this.” He assured as he laid his head back on the pillow, closing his eyes trustingly.

Gordon glared at him for a moment, then he redirected his attention to his own lower body. He had to figure out exactly _how_ riding worked. It took way too much effort to rely only on his legs to raise him up and down so maybe it was more in the ass bounce? How did he make sure his dick didn’t pop out? Should he be worried about it bending awkwardly under him if he slammed too hard?

Calhoun sneaked an eye back open after a second and grinned gently watching the doctor try to figure out his rhythm on the fly. It made his heart flutter thinking... Freemind was inexperienced with men. As much as he screamed and cried not to draw attention to it, Calhoun was his first in a lot of these acts. Just to be trusted like that stroked the guard’s ego big time.

Watching the cute, flushed, determined expression on Freemind’s face as he testingly bounced his hips... made new ideas start to formulate in Barney’s head. But all good things come to those who wait. Now wasn’t the time to strike.

Gordon finally rested, sitting on his full length which earned a muffled groan from his patient. “Okay, I’m ready.” He said through a shiver. He didn’t want to think about it too hard but... being filled up felt really good. Like a little bonus as he gripped his own boner under his shirt. Ya know, didn’t make him strange for finding new ways to gain pleasure besides a direct touch to his dick. Even straight guys experimented. Shut up.

The two men erupted with noisy breaths as he started properly bouncing on his dick, the pace was inconsistent at first but as he picked up speed, he found the energy to push through the moments where the inner tickling tried to trip him up. Fuck, this was harder than it looked! Trying to keep the friction going in his ass and coordinating his hand to jerk himself off. Kinda like being told to pat your head and rub your belly at the same time? But he _refused_ to let up because the sensation was just too good.

Freemind’s eyes glanced down, burning into Barney who was breathing just as heavily. They had being fucking around so long that the both of them were eager to finish now. He insides hugging him again and again, each pull of his hips leaving Calhoun impatient for the next time he engulfed him.

He tried to behave himself as long as he could. But then without asking, his hands crawled around and grabbed the doctor’s ass cheeks. Groping them hard and making him gasp. “I-I said not to intervene, asshole!!” Freemind groaned out with an angry bite to his voice.

“I don’t care, you feel so fucking good...!” Calhoun moaned as he spread his cheeks apart and slammed his hip up into him.

If Gordon was distracted before, this REALLY threw a wrench in his gears. His hips stuttered awkwardly when Barney prodded his insides and made it impossible to focus. Drool almost escaping his mouth as the sweet sensation struck him. “I should have knocked you out w-when I had the chance...!” He complained but his voice was littered with nothing but hot pleasure. He could only fight back by forcing his hips down to meet his thrusts- which ripped a loud overwhelmed wail from Freemind instead. Nope, bad idea, bad idea. He couldn’t let him think he could milk screams out of him like _that._

His eyes fell back onto Barney, his face red and inching closer to absolute bliss. “Don’t stop now, Doc... I’m _so fucking close._ ”

Alright. Those words sending tingly shivers down deep in his gut made Freemind reconsider. He whipped his hips down even harder onto him, earning a cry from Barney this time, but at a cost. That brought Gordon dangerously close to the finish line- God, why did this always happen!? It made him insane that he was constantly out lasting him! He blamed the double simulation!

But Barney kept going, “That’s it, good, that’s _perfect,_ you can do it just...like that...!” His voice stiff and forced out as he threw his head back further.

Even though Calhoun spoke simply and straightforward, it was still praise nonetheless. And that was Gordon’s biggest weakness. “Stop talking...!” He hissed with the last bit of fight in him, but the damage had already been dealt. He sat down to shove his rod as deep as he could as he came. His lab coat messily hanging off a shoulder, head up so his neck was exposed with the faintest bits of sweat dirtying him. Blinding pleasure sweeping over his body.

Barney followed suit as his cock was pressed to the base and squeezed so tightly it had him seeing stars. The two of them were pushing so hard on another to get deeper, it made his ass hurt. And it felt all the better after waiting so long~

They were motionless. Calhoun sinking into the bed as limp bodied as ever, besides his dick that Freemind refused to let go of for a moment. Squeezing it tenderly as if savoring the feeling. Finally, he composed himself enough to lean forward and let him slide out.

He was speechless, mind hazy with a feeling so fresh that he almost wanted to go for a round two- Oh right they had been doing something before this.

“Here,” Gordon smirked, having come in his own hand and shoves two fingers into Barney’s mouth, smearing jizz on his teeth. “Make sure to take your medicine or else the problem will come back.”

Calhoun immediately sputtered, “Fucking god damnit- Again!?” He was forced to lick the goo off his gums with a scowl. Freemind would have a panic attack if he put his dick anywhere near his mouth, and yet the hypocrite had the audacity to shove his cum in his twice now?? That’s it. His payback was getting moved up to _sooner rather than later_.

“Hey, don’t blame me. Do I look like a pharmacist? It’s just my job to administer it where needed.” Gordon chuckled evilly as he made his way off the bed and to find his pants.

Barney sat with a sigh, plucking the rubber off and tossing it in the trash. Gordon doing the same with his gloves.

“So.” Freemind fixed his tie and pat himself off standing tall again. “The treatment worked, yes?”

Calhoun smiled with half lidded, amused eyes. “I’ll admit my body does feel a bit better now, yeah.”

“Fantastic. That’ll be four hundred dollars.”


End file.
